Oh and good luck today!xx
I slip the phone back into my bag, making a mental note to ask Camilla how she managed to hack into my calendar in the first place to not only arrange an an appointment but also set up hourly countdown reminders on the day.
Typical Camilla.
She'd claimed the position of my best friend within forty-five seconds of meeting me at Corrigan's last summer, and since then, she's appointed herself as my unofficial life manager.
The waiting room smells like lavender and has that carefully neutral beige color scheme that's supposed to be calming.I check my watch—five minutes early, just how Camilla programmed the reminder.
"Lenora Wells?"Dr.Caroline Henshaw appears in the doorway, and I follow her into an office that feels more like someone's living room than a clinical space."How are you feeling today?"
"Fine."The automatic response slips out before I can stop it.
She settles into her chair, pen poised over her notepad.
"Fine is often where we hide."
I sink into the familiar couch, pulling a throw pillow into my lap."I don't know what you want me to say."
"Let's start with how has this week been for you?"
My fingers trace the edge of the pillow, finding the familiar worn seam.
"Same as every other week, I suppose."
Dr Henshaw scribbles something down on her notepad.
“Listen, I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to tell you.”
“You tell me whatever you want to tell me.”
“My best friend, she’s the one that arranged this because ever since the accident I’ve just had trouble sleeping.But I mean, that’s normal isn’t it?”
"Accident?What kind of accident?”
“I was involved in a pretty bad car accident last summer.”
Dr Henshaw makes another note and now it’s kind of pissing me off that she’s making these silent observations with no explanation.
“Would you be comfortable sharing more about that night with me?"
"Isn't the point of all this to try and move forward instead of looking back?"
"Yes," Dr.Henshaw leans forward slightly, her expression patient."But sometimes, moving forward is impossible when the thing that's holding us back is something we refuse to acknowledge fully happened."
"I am acknowledging it happened.I almost died because of some drunk driving idiot.But I didn't.End of story."
The words come out sharper than I intended, and I can feel my shoulders tensing.
"Your conscious mind might think it's moving on, but your subconscious mind is still holding on."
"So?"I shift restlessly, crossing me arms against my chest like armor.
"So, what the mind tries to forget, the body will always remember."Her voice is gentle but firm."There's no running away from it, Lenora.Eventually, it will find you and demand that you be ready to face it head-on."
I shift uncomfortably, my leg bouncing with nervous energy."I don't know what you want me to tell you."
“So, you’re not sleeping?"She asks, sitting back in her chair, her pen now resting idle.
