The apartment hums—fridge, pipes, muffled traffic.I cling to those tiny sounds like they’re proof the world didn’t end in that building.Even though in a lot of ways, it did.
My phone vibrates in my hand.My fingers shake too much to steady the screen but I can see there’s messages from Mom, Ollie, Nick and six from Nora.
I don’t open a single one, instead I scroll through my contacts until my eyes land on a name.
Christian.
The last time I saw him was at that party last summer when Nora came back and when everything started unraveling.
My thumb hesitates.I could delete it.Ishoulddelete it.
And instead I should call Nora.Or Nick or Ollie or anyone.
Or I could try to sleep.
Instead, I type—fast.
Nate
Hey man.Can you hook me up?Something strong.
My foot won’t stop tapping.Heart racing, mouth dry.I try to stop my shaking hands by biting me nail in anticipation of a response.
Christian
Yeah bro.I got you.Swing by when you can.
I stare at my reflection on the screen—hollow eyes, bruised face, the ghost of who I was.
The pain quiets for a second.
That’s how I know I’m fucked.
Because quiet shouldn’t feel good.
Not like this.
CHAPTER36
CONNOR JAMES
NORA
It’s beena few hours since Nate was released from the hospital, and I haven’t heard from him.Jay gives me vague updates when I call—“He’s fine,” “He’s sleeping right now,” “He just needs time”—but I can hear the lie in his voice.
It’s the same tone people use when they’re protecting someone from a truth they’re not ready to face.
It feels like déjà vu—like last year when he vanished after my accident—but this time it’s different.This time it feels like he’s not just hiding from the world.
He’s trying to disappear from it completely.
I’m sitting on my bed, phone clutched in my hand, when Jay finally calls back.His voice is strained, sharp with panic.
“Nora, I fucked up.He’s gone.”
My heart stumbles.
“What do you mean he’s gone?”
