"I'm fine. I just..." I looked at him. Really looked at him.
God, he was beautiful. Dangerous and beautiful and I was so screwed.
"I've been thinking about what you said. About accepting both versions of you. About choosing with my eyes open." My voice shook. "I don't know if I can do that, Kai. I don't know if I'm strong enough."
He stood very still. "Then why are you here?"
"Because I can't stay away." The admission tore out of me. "I've tried. God, I've tried so hard to keep my distance. To be smart about this. But I can't. I need you."
His expression changed. Went dark. Hungry. Predatory.
"What do you need, Aria? Be specific."
I stepped closer. My body was making decisions my brain hadn't approved yet.
"I need to feel something other than fear and grief. I need you tomake me forget everything else. The execution. Your father. The wedding. All of it. Just... make it go away for a while."
His jaw clenched. "If we do this again, there's no going back. You understand that? You'll be mine. Completely. I won't be able to let you go."
"I'm already yours." The truth of it settled in my chest. "I think I have been since that first night. I just didn't want to admit it."
Something in him snapped. He closed the distance, his hands cupping my face as his mouth found mine. Hard. Demanding. His tongue swept past my lips, claiming, possessing. I opened for him immediately, my own hands fisting in his hair, pulling him closer.
This wasn't gentle. This was desperation. Need. Two people who'd been fighting this for too long finally giving in completely.
His hands left my face, sliding down to grip my waist, pulling me flush against him. I could feel every hard line of his body. Could feel exactly how much he wanted this.
His mouth crashed into mine like a man starving, his lips bruising, his tongue forcing its way past my teeth before I could even gasp. I made a sound, somewhere between a whimper and a moan—my back arching as his hands fisted in my hair, yanking my head back just enough to deepen the angle. The sting of it sent a jolt straight to my core, my body responding before my mind could catch up. His other hand slid beneath the thin silk of my nightgown, fingers digging into the bare flesh of my ass, lifting me against him like I was weightless. Like I was his.
And god, I wanted to be.
Fear coiled in my chest, but it wasn’t the cold, sharp kind that made me want to run. It was hot, liquid, pooling low in my belly, making my thighs clench around nothing. His body was a furnace against mine, all hard muscle and restrained violence, his rough edges against my bare skin where the nightgown had ridden up. He walked me backward without breaking the kiss, his steps sure, mine stumbling, my heels catching on the edge of the rug before the back of my knees hit the mattress. I fell, but he followed, his weight pressing me into the sheets, his mouth neverleaving mine.
His hands were everywhere. One tangled in my hair, pulling just enough to make my scalp sting, the other ripping at the delicate straps of my nightgown. The silk tore with a sound like a whisper, the cool air hitting my bare skin as he exposed me. I should have stopped him. I should have something. But then his palm cupped my breast, his thumb rolling over my nipple until it ached, and all I could do was moan into his mouth, my fingers clawing at his shoulders through the fabric of his dress shirt.
“Fuck,” he growled against my lips, his voice rough, almost angry. Like he hated how much he wanted this. Like he hated me for making him want it. “You’re so goddamn perfect.”
I wasn’t perfect. I was small. Breakable. His hands were too big, his body too heavy, his presence too much. But when he finally pulled back, his dark eyes burning into mine, I didn’t look away. I couldn’t. He held me there, pinned by his gaze as much as his body, his breath hot against my swollen lips.
“Tell me to ruin you,” he demanded, his voice a low, dangerous thing.
“Ruin every part of me.” I whispered and I meant it.
A growl rumbled in his chest, and then his lips were on mine again, harder this time, punishing. His teeth nipped at my lower lip, drawing a sharp gasp from me before his tongue soothed the sting. His hands were relentless, stripping the tattered remains of my nightgown away, leaving me naked beneath him. The air was cool against my skin, but I burned. I ached. I’d never wanted anything like this before never burned like this.
He pulled back just long enough for me to see him. His chest was a landscape of muscle and faint scars, his skin olive-toned and smooth except for the dark trail of hair that disappeared into the waistband of his trousers. I reached for him, my small hands trembling as I traced the lines of his abs, the ridges of his chest, the faint scar above his eyebrow. He caught my wrist, his grip firm but not painful, and pressed my palm flat against his heart.
“You feel that?” he rasped, his voice rough. “That’s you. That’s what you do to me.”
I didn’t have time to answer. His mouth was on my neck, his teeth sinking into the sensitive skin just below my ear. I cried out, my back arching, my fingers tangling in his dark hair. He bit me again, lower this time, at the junction of my shoulder and collarbone, his tongue soothing the mark even as his hands roamed lower, cupping my breasts, pinching my nipples until I was writhing beneath him.
“Kai—” His name came out as a broken whisper, a plea. For what, I didn’t even know.
“Shh,” he murmured against my skin, his breath hot.
His mouth trailed lower, his lips wrapping around one tight nipple, his tongue flicking before he sucked hard. I gasped, my fingers tightening in his hair, my hips lifting off the bed without my permission. He chuckled darkly, the vibration sending a jolt straight to my core, and switched to the other breast, giving it the same treatment. His free hand slid down my stomach, his fingers teasing the damp curls between my legs before slipping lower, finding me already wet, already aching.
“Fuck, Aria,” he groaned, his voice muffled against my skin. “You’re dripping.”
