I’m getting worked up now. We’re going down a road I wanted to do everything in my power to avoid, and I don’t like it. I need to change the damn subject.
“And because you matter,” I continued, “let’s talk about the panic attack you were having when I first came in. Is it because of the window issue?”
I’m recalling the panic attack that she had when I first suggested bringing her here.
“It’s that and everything else,” she admits. “I’m doing my best not to think about the windows.”
As she says the word, I can see the panic flaring in her eyes again.
So, I kiss her. Long and slow and deep. Kiss her like I’ve been longing to do since I left her in my kitchen this morning, what now may as well have been a lifetime ago. She kisses me back, making a needy sound that stirs my dick.
Now is not the time for a hard-on. I’ve got Lucky, our half sisters, and the woman who birthed us showing up at any second. And Scorpion’s going to be moving out his prisoner soon. I need to control myself.
Thinking about the Russian hellcat down the hall wilts my cock significantly.
I lick into Isla’s mouth, tasting her strawberry lip gloss. She’s summer and sunshine, everything I don’t deserve, everything I so desperately want but can’t have. The reminder has me breaking the kiss.
“I have a few things that might help.”
“You do?” She sounds surprised.
“Yeah. Let me show you.”
She wiggles off my lap, and I miss the feeling of her there, the rightness of it. There’s something about this woman that feels like she’s mine, on a primal level I’ve never known before. But then I stand up too, because that’s a fucking idiotic, dangerous thought I can’t entertain.
And most importantly, I don’t want her to suffer. When she hurts, it’s like someone ripped a hole in my chest, pulled out my veins, and cut them open just to watch me bleed out.
I go to the boxes of “virtual” window decals the men rounded up for me in record time and pull one out, showing her a scene of palm trees presiding over water that’s the same color as the ocean in St. Thomas. When I told the guys beach-themed, I had no idea they’d find something exactly like what I had in mind.
“What is it?” Isla asks, her nose scrunched up as she eyes the rolled-up decal in my hand.
“It’s a window.” I unroll it slowly, then peel off the backing before affixing it to the nearest wall.
As I smooth out the bubbles, I tell myself it’s not terrible. Out of the corner of my eye, I’d probably swear this was legit. I know this isn’t a real solution. It’s probably not even a solution. But I had to try, and lacking any other place to bring her on such short notice, this was the best I could do.
“Alessio. Did you buy me a fake window?”
I steal a glance back at her. “Technically, it’s a real window. There are shutters and everything. And I bought you fifteen of them. You can put them anywhere you like.”
“Nobody’s ever bought me stick-on windows before.”
“Yeah, well, I’ve never bought stick-on windows for anyone,” I say, keeping my tone light. “But don’t let it go to your head, okay?”
She laughs then, and it’s the best fucking sound I’ve heard all day. “You’re… This is… I have no words.”
A rush of tenderness bubbles up inside me, replacing the ruthlessness that usually lives there, and I can’t do a thing about it.
I reach out a hand to her. “Come over here,tesoro.”
She takes my hand and comes toward me tentatively, like a doe in the forest who’s scented a hunter and knows she’s perpetually one step away from something bad. I’m the something bad, but I’m not letting that acknowledgment slow me down.
I tug her into place, until she’s in front of me, staring at the window decal, and then I settle my hands on her shoulders, gently massaging. “When you look at the wall, think about St. Thomas. Visualize yourself there. Know that everything is okay. This is the safest place you can be. No one knows about this place except for my family and our inner circle, all made men who would die for us. Do you understand?”
She nods slowly.
“Good. Look at the palm trees swaying in a gentle breeze. And that water. It matches the Caribbean Sea.”
“It matches your eyes.”
