I can’t fucking stand it.
Instantly, I’m hunkering down at her side, running my hand up and down her spine in slow, calming motions. “Another panic attack?”
She keeps her head bowed, not looking at me. “I’m fine.”
Her voice is muffled, but I can hear that she’s upset. And she’s obviously not fine, so I settle onto my ass on the hard floor and pull her into my lap. She protests with a squeak, but I ignore that. I’m not going to let her suffer on her own. I caused this shit by dragging her to my apartment and leaving her there, thinking she’d be safe. I let down my guard too much. My men weren’t prepared. I’m failing the family, failing Priest, and now I’ve failed Isla too.
“What are you doing?” she asks, still refusing to look at me.
“Holding you,” I tell her gruffly.
I’m not used to being this way. Not used to caring about anyone or anything other than the family and the empire we’ve built. She makes me feel things I’ve never felt before and I don’t fucking like it, but we’ve gone too far for me to undo what’s between us now.
She sighs, and I think she might start to fight, but instead, she curls into my chest like she’s surrendering. I hope it’s that she feels safe here in my arms and not that she’s given up on being a stubborn badass. We haven’t had much chance to unpack everything that happened today.
“Just breathe,tesoro,” I tell her, holding her close, inhaling her scent, absorbing her warmth.
Not much rattles me after everything I’ve been through, after the things I’ve had to do and see. But today sure as fuck did. It’s still sinking into my brain that our restaurant is gone. And we have to make a battle plan for how we’re going to deal with the Bratva moving forward. Scorpion’s latest acquisition makes the stakes all the higher.
He fucking kidnapped the Pakhan’s sister.
We’ll be lucky if Priest doesn’t kill us both when he gets back. That is, if the Russians don’t get their hands on us first. I’ll go down in a hail of bullets and blood if need be. I’m an Andriani to the end. But I’ve got to do everything in my power to keep Isla out of this war.
There’s a whole hell of a lot on my shoulders, weighing on me.
“You’re not going to kill her, are you?” she asks, her voice quiet.
I realize she’s talking about Ekaterina Sidorov, who’s still wailing like a banshee from another room while Scorpion gets the supplies for a stay at his cabin upstate sorted with some of our men.
“I’m not going to, no,” I say honestly.
The truth is, I don’t know what my brother has planned for her. I didn’t ask.
“But what about Scorpion?”
“He’ll do whatever he has to do,” I say instead of giving her a real answer.
She stiffens, her head shooting up. “He’s going to murder that poor woman?”
Her green eyes spark up at me, and there she is again, coming back to life. My relief is so sudden and palpable that I have to kiss her.
“I didn’t say that.” I lower my head and brush my mouth over hers.
She doesn’t push me away, kissing me back instead.
Her breathing is steady and calm now, her arms going around my neck in a tight hold like she’s afraid she’ll lose me.
And that’s inevitable, given the two different worlds we live in and the way mine is currently imploding. A week from now, she’ll be back in the Midwest where she belongs, teaching her students, typing away on her computer, forgetting me and all the mayhem that’s unfolded.
The thought shouldn’t leave a pang like a knife being lodged in my chest, but it does.
She’s the first to end the kiss. “You didn’t answer me with a no, though.”
Damn it. Isla’s still stuck on what’s happening to Ekaterina Sidorov.
“We’ve been over this before, sweetheart,” I tell her as gently as possible. “The less you know about any of our businesses, the better off you’ll be.”
“Killing an innocent woman is part of your business?”
