My mother greeted me at the door, a pinched look on her face. There was more to it than the usual disappointment that it wasn’t my brother knocking. I should be worried about that, but I couldn’t bring myself to leave my bubble.
The pictures of my brother on every wall did manage to push through the haze. I immediately shoved that to the back of my mind, because when I turned down the hall, the Pakhan was staring at me with intent eyes.
“Hello, Pakhan,” I said, bowing my head respectfully.
He wordlessly gestured for me to sit in one of my father’s living room chairs. I obeyed while internally noting the irony of him once again acting this way in my family’s home.
“You know why I’m here,” he said.
“Dmitri,” I said, unease knotting in my stomach.
The Pakhan leaned forward in his seat, a look of anticipation marking his eyes. I’d never seen him show this much interest in anything. When he’d ordered me to murder my brother, the only emotion on his face was irritation. Annoyed that he was having to take time out of his day to deal with it.
I swallowed as I summoned the words. I’d rehearsed them in my head ever since I’d decided how to handle this next meeting.
Thirty seconds into me speaking, the earnestness had fled the Pakhan’s face, and was replaced by irritation.
It sent a warning up my spine, but I refused to veer off course. There was no way in hell I was betraying Dmitri.
Despite our past, he’d become the only good part of my life. Yes, he’d eventually grow bored, and ditch me for whoever's clothes were lying on the dresser.
But even as the Pakhan’s jaw tightened, I didn’t open Dmitri up to any type of blowback.
“He’s perfectly devoted,” I said, mentally addingto my clit.
A vein drew taut on the Pakhan’s neck. “That’s all you have to tell me?”
There was a warning there, but I refused to betray Dmitri.
“Yes,” I said firmly.
His eyes narrowed on me, but I didn’t buckle under the tense silence.
The Pakhan sat back in his seat, his face now a mask of indifference. “You know Alisa, if you’re unable to help me I’ll find someone else who will.”
My heart thudded at the threat, but I wouldn’t break. Still, I needed to play the game, let him think that I’d been completely earnest in my attempts to find information.
“Sir, his devotion to you is impeccable. As your loyal follower, if there wereanythingmore I could tell you then I would.”
Lies, but from the thoughtful look in his eyes he seemed to consider it. After all, everyone around me underestimated me, thought I was nothing but a pawn they could easily control.
Why would they assume anything had changed?
Finally, he nodded and stood up. When the door closed behind him, I finally allowed my actual reaction to unfurl. Sweat trickled down my back, and the shiver I’d been suppressing hit me like a shock of lightning. I thought back through the carefully planned anecdotes and tried to determine if he’d detected untruths.
What had he been looking for? Did he have misgivings about Dmitri, or was this simple due diligence for the heir apparent? My mother stepped into the room, and I nearly jumped out of my skin.
“You shouldn’t linger,” she said, glancing over her shoulder. “He’s not happy with you.”
From the warning in her eyes, I knew my father’s mood was foul and his fists would be even harsher if he caught me.
I silently stole through the hallways. A lump knotted in my throat when I passed by a full scale painting of Kiril. With one last regretful backwards glance, I turned towards the back door I’d mastered escaping while growing up in this volatile household.
Even as the icy wind beat at my skin, I continued walking until I hit my favorite secluded section in Central Park. By day, there’d always be the occasional speed walker or tourist. At night everyone knew better than to come here. Ironic that the placemost people avoided after dark had been far safer than my gilded home in the Upper East Side.
I leaned against a gnarled tree and closed my eyes. If you’d told me a year ago I’d be risking my life for Dmitri, I would’ve laughed in your face.
But maybe that was because I’d been too hard on him.
