“Well, it is the kiss and, uh, me—” She cleared her throat.
“Telling me you’re a virgin,” I offered helpfully.
Her flush went from pink to red.“Jude!”she yelped.
If the weight of that detail hadn’t been pressing so heavily in my thoughts for the last seven days, seven hours, and for all I knew, seven minutes at this point, I would have been able to chuckle at her embarrassment.Not because I wanted her to be embarrassed, but because there was no point in it.She didn’t need to be embarrassed, except I was downright obsessed over that detail.How had she gotten to thirty as a virgin?How?
And yet, I thought I knew how.She dated here and there, but not much.She was the glue that held the logistics of her family together.Her brother and his antics were always rumbling in the background, while her parents were mostly checked out.They were loving, but mildly neglectful, happy to let Kendall be the parent for all of them.That didn’t leave much room for relationships and dating.
“Have you really wanted to kiss me?For a long time?”she surprised me by asking.
It was my turn to steel myself and take a breath, letting it out in a gust.I stuffed one hand in my pocket and ran the other through my hair before clasping the back of my neck.“Yeah.”
Her eyes widened.
“What?You didn’t believe me?”
She wrinkled her nose, lifting one shoulder in a small shrug.
“I mean, it wasn’t that I thought you were lying.I guess it’s hard to believe that anybody would have wanted to kiss me for years.I’m not exactly?—”
I narrowed my eyes, dropping my hand from my neck.“Kendall, you’re beautiful.”
She looked down at her hay-covered, dusty overalls and her tank top, blinking as she looked up at me.“I’m kind of a tomboy.”
I was honestly befuddled.“Kendall, you’re gorgeous.Trust me.”
“I doubt you’re privy to the thoughts of other men,” she said, raising a skeptical brow.
“Maybe not specifically, but you’re sexy.Trust me on this.I know the way men’s minds work.We’re pretty simple.We see a pair of gorgeous big brown eyes, those wild curls, and your curves…” Just saying these things out loud made my body tighten in anticipation.“And, well, I want you.”
She blinked again.“Oh.”
“But that’s not why I wanted to kiss you.Youarebeautiful.And yes, I’ve noticed all those things about you.But—” I stuffed both hands in my pockets now, scuffing the toe of my boot along the ground.“I’ve been half in love with you for years.More than half.”
Her brows flew upward, her eyes round.“What?”she breathed.
“Have I ever been serious with anyone?Think about it.”
“I guess not,” she said slowly.
“I never told you this, but every single woman I dated casually told me that it was obvious I was in love with you and that I should get a clue.”
Kendall blinked rapidly before she took a quick breath and started chewing the inside of her cheek again.
“I don’t want to ruin our friendship,” I added hurriedly.“I have no idea how you feel.None.”
“I don’t want to ruin our friendship either.”Her voice was a little hoarse.Her brow crinkled, and she shifted on her feet.
I closed the distance between us in a few strides, reaching for her hand.“We’re not going to ruin our friendship, Kendall.It’s not going to happen.If—” I began before she shook her head quickly, her curls bouncing in her ponytail.
“You don’t have to apologize for the kiss.I wanted to kiss you.I have for years.”
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
