He roars, putting a fist through the wall.
“Wh-what?” I frown, understanding what he’s saying but not understanding the why. Why would he ever think that.
“Oh, yes,” he starts nodding fast as he shakes his finger in my direction before he jumps off the couch and starts pacing. “You knew! You knew this was coming to an end and didn’t want to miss your meal ticket. You…you motherfucking bitch! You did that on purpose!”
Did the thunder from outside somehow make it in? Is that why my whole body is shaking and crumbling? Did it hit me?
Maybe it’s my subconsciousness trying to soften the blow I was just served. Maybe it’s trying to find anything—anyone—else to blame for the hit I just took. Because it can’t be true. It couldn’t have come from Joey. My Joey.
The only man I’ve ever loved. The father of my baby.
It can’t.
It can’t all be a lie. I couldn’t have given my heart to that kind of person, could I?
“Hello?” That same, familiar voice snaps angrily and my eyes search for who could sound just the same as my boyfriend does, only to find the room empty, sans us.
I suck in a sharp breath just as another lightning splits the dark sky apart behind those angry eyes, allowing the storm to consume me.
It keeps on and on and on as the dark cloak of night surrounds us, spreading terror and confusion over every inch of my body as I feel its long, thin tentacles seep under my skin, crawling painfully through every crevice of my body until my soul is barred for its enjoyment.
What a sick game it’s playing…
Yet I can’t tear my eyes away from those magnetic strikes of lighting on a dark starless canvas, serving as both my hope and death in one. As my only solace and damnation, light and fear dancing a dangerous dance across the skies and I can’t stop looking.
I can hear more of those angry words, but they are now a distant murmur against the whispers coming from the outside. The one I’ve heard before.
Whispers meant only for me. Whispers that sound a whole lot like a warning.
It grows so loud, so booming, it’s almost painful. My ears are ringing and all I want to do is press my hands against them, to squish my head until I can no longer hear the truth.
The sound of that whisper comes to life, one letter at a time.
It’s like walking through a jungle. Trying to find a way out, until…
The storm is coming…
Watch out…
I suck in a breath just in time when suddenly, Joey’s hand wraps around my wrist in an unforgiving hold and he tugs me off the couch.
“Wh-what are you—”
He stops just as fast as he started moving, making me stumble into him. His venom and spit coating my skin. “I don’t give a single fuck about what plans you’ve built in that psychotic head of yours, but I’m not going to allow some trash from Iris Lake to ruin my whole fucking life! You’ll have that abortion even if I have to snuff that pest out of you with my own bare hands!” Joey spit every word like a whip meant to slice you open.
And for a second, for a tiny moment, I want to allow it. I want to take every beating…but at the mere thought, the rain hit against the glass, shaking me from within, reminding me it won’t beIwho takes that beating. It won’t bemylife on the line. Because mine was written out a long time ago.
It was determined before I was born, and I was a blithering fool to think I could somehow change it. I was a fool thinking that anyone could love a girl like me. I dared to dream for the first time in my life and now I’m paying the price for it.
Girls like me don’t get to dream. We don’t get to turn into princesses. We crawl and claw our way out only to get pushed down again.
But hell if I’ll allow my baby-to-be as well.
Hell, if I’ll allow anyone to come near him.
That tiny heartbeat…it’s now a part of me, and I’ll die if I let anyone try to “snuff it out.”
It’s interesting how quickly all the love I’ve had for the man standing in front of me disappears. As if that relentless storm outside is washing the dark stain off my heart and soul until all I feel is hatred.
