“Good because we need you on the ice against Bolton. That game falls on family night, right? I should make sure my parents are set.” Ollie pulls out his phone to send a quick text.
“Shit, good call. Ellie, I’ll make sure you have a spot in one of the suites.” I wrap an arm around her waist, tucking her head under my chin. “That way I’ll be able to find you from the ice. Plus, the fam is already dying to see you again.” I should also look into getting her a jersey by then. Couple of weeks should give me enough time.
A faint blush reddens her cheeks. “Any chance you could add Nicole too? We’ve been planning on going for a while now.”
“Done. I’m sure Nicole will be dying to hear all the embarrassing stories about me from my sisters.”
“Sienna’s gonna be there?” Ollie interrupts, freezing in place.
“Yeah, why wouldn’t she be?”
All I get is a shrug. “Just asking.” Followed by him grabbing a bag of chips and running upstairs.
“That was weird, right?” I turn to Eliana who looks equally as confused as I feel.
“A little bit, but we established all goalies are a little weird so that was probably normal for him.”
“Fair enough.” I let it go, leading us upstairs. In the back of my head I couldn’t help but wonder why Ollie got so spooked at the mention of my little sister.
“What are we doing for lunch?” I rest my chin on Eliana’s shoulder as she feverishly types away on her laptop. She’s fully locked in, which is why I’m not surprised when she doesn’t respond. I place a kiss on her neck, hoping that works. She just shuffles back into my chest as dozens of words fly across the screen.
While I was watching game tape, Eliana plopped herself in between my legs and continued making her way through her never-ending to-do list. I can’t say I minded. Something about Eliana made me want to hold her whenever I could. Like she was my own personal safety blanket.
When I think she’s finally about to respond to my lunch question, she turns to me and says, “We should probably discuss how you want to handle our meeting with your assistant coach and Violet.”
I look down and see her Google calendar open to an event titled,“Talk to Jake about tutoring meeting”scheduled for now. “Wow you really do put everything in your calendar.”
“If it’s not on the calendar it’s not getting done. I wasn’t joking when I said I live and die by it.”She laughs.
“Just so we’re on the same page. As far as Violet knows you’re still my official tutor?” I check.
“Yup. She is aware we had a rough patch in the beginning, but I didn’t tell her I quit on you. I wanted to avoid you getting in trouble with the tutoring center. It all worked out in the end.” She shrugs, though there’s a tension to her.
“What’s wrong?”
Eliana worries her lip between her teeth. “Would you be upset if we kept our relationship a secret? At least in front of your assistant coach and Violet.”
Of all the things she could’ve asked me, I wasn’t expecting that. “Why?”
“I just don’t want to come off as unprofessional. Dating the guy I was tutoring could be seen as crossing a boundary I shouldn’t. I’m already nervous about what the people in your mom’s lab this summer will think of me when they realize I’m dating you, and I just don’t want Violet to be upset with me.”
I struggle to silence the insecurity that’s building in my chest. Why did she want to hide our relationship? “Are you worried about what Violet will think?” I bite.
Eliana’s eyes widen as she shakes her head and turns her body around to face me. “No, that’s not it at all. I promise.”
She looked and sounded sincere but the twinge in my chest wouldn’t let up. “Are you sure? Because I really don’t think Mason and Violet would care. It feels like you’re hiding me.”
Eliana settles her hands on her knees, clearly nervous. “It’s not that at all. It’s more so related to my own anxieties about what people will say about me working with your mom this summer.”
“I don’t really understand what Violet has to do with that. You might just have to accept that people are going to say whatever they want.”
“I know, I know. It just hits deeper for me. I always feel likeI need to be overly cautious about the things that I do or say.” She takes a deep breath, letting it out before continuing. “As a woman of color in academia there have been many moments where someone has not so subtly alluded to the fact that I’ve been given the scholarships or opportunities that I have because I’m a diversity hire, or that I have ties to someone who gave me a handout. Over time the more you start to hear those things the more you assume everyone must be thinking that about you. Which is why I want to keep my personal life separate from my professional life. Especially in instances that might add fuel to the fire and give people another excuse to say I didn’t deserve the opportunities I’ve earned. That’s why I was so against fake dating in the beginning. And why, even now, I can’t stop thinking about what other people are going to think of me.”
Out of all the things that could’ve come out of her mouth, I never expected it to be that. “Anyone who thinks that is a piece of shit that isn’t worth a second of your time.”
“Thanks. And Iknowthat deep down…but I still feel like I need to protect myself. That’s why I want to keep our relationship from Violet and Mason. At least until the semester is over. I know Violet wouldn’t judge me, but if word got around somehow to the tutoring center I know eventually someone would have an issue with it.” Her sentences speed up with each word, matching the anxious energy she was omitting.
I place my hand on her shaking knee and smile as I watch her relax with my touch. “It’s okay, I can wait a few months to share the news with everyone. If you haven’t guessed, I don’t plan on going anywhere soon. You’re stuck with me,” I tease to lighten the mood.
