Before I can tell him that I’m just having an off night he’s disappeared into the crowd. How bad would it be if I hid in my room for the rest of the night? Damn I really was mopey tonight. If only I could figure out why. It definitely had nothing to do with the fact that every time I thought about doing something fun, I imagined Eliana tucked away in her bedroom stressed over whatever assignment she was working on.
If she continued the way she was going she would definitely burn herself out. And I was contributing to that. Another burden on her schedule that she had to deal with. The fact that she was so busy she didn’t even have time to buy groceries wasmore than concerning. I wonder if she’s even had dinner tonight. Or if she’s so preoccupied by what she has to get done that she doesn’t even realize how late it is already. I blink confused about when I suddenly became so preoccupied with my tutor that I was worried about whether or not she was eating. There was a zero percent chance she was thinking about me at that moment. Yet somehow Eliana had managed to take up my headspace without me even realizing it. Maybe Ollie was right. I needed to snap myself out of whatever weird state I was in. I head towards the kitchen to get myself another drink when I see Mandy in the corner with her sorority sisters. Just the distraction I needed. Mandy was easy, and totally fine with my no-strings-attached rule. Except I can’t bring myself to get any closer to her. I’m reaching for the keg when Mandy grabs my hand and drags me down the hall into a decently secluded corner of Hockey House.
“Hey.” She practically purrs as she wraps her arms around my neck.
“Hi.” I give her a small smile, and then her lips are on mine. She takes a step forward, effectively pushing me against the wall as she grinds herself on me. I kiss her back, but I’m nowhere near as enthusiastic as she is. The second I close my eyes I see Mason’s disappointed expression, telling me I’m being demoted. I try my best to focus my attention on Mandy, except now Mason’s face is replaced with Eliana’s exhausted expression. I feel a twinge in my chest.Fuck me. What the hell is wrong with my brain and why does hooking up with Mandy suddenly feel like such a…chore? This blows.
Mandy pulls away, looking confused. “Jake, is everything okay?”
“Yup. Definitely. Why wouldn’t it be?” I shrug, shoving my hands into the back pocket of my jeans.
“Well, for one, you’re not touching me at all. And your lipsare giving dead fish.” She scrunches her eyebrows.“Did I do something wrong?”
“No. No. Definitely not. I’m just in a weird head space right now.”
“You sure I did nothing wrong?” She looks down at her shoes, clearly embarrassed.
“Mandy, I promise it’s not you. I’m just going through it right now.” I keep things vague, not having it in me to confess the fact that I could get benched soon.
“Oh, well, I’m sorry about that.”
“I appreciate it.” I look around awkwardly, wanting to get out of this conversation as fast as I can without offending her. “I’m probably not too fun to hang around tonight. I just need some space.”
I plop back down into my spot on the coach, eyes glued back onto the door, becausealright fine. Maybe Ollie was right and maybe there was a part of me that was hoping Eliana would come through the door. Because she deserved a break and fun Saturday night to herself. That was the only reason why I wanted to see her tonight. For her sake. Not for mine.
“So why’d you just blow off Mandy?” Ollie shows up again, startling me. He’s like my damn sleep-paralysis demon.
“I didn’t blow her off. I just wasn’t in the mood to hook up.”
“Since. When.” Oliver places a hand on my forehead like he’s taking my temperature. “Are you coming down with something?”
“Fuck off.” I swat his hand away.
“No, I’m serious. I’m genuinely concerned now. Maybe I should take you to the hospital.”
“Alright. I’m done here.” I get up from the couch and head towards the door.
“Where are you going?” Oliver calls.
“For a walk.” I just need to clear my head. And some fresh air.
Chapter 16
Eliana
I’ve re-read this paper at least three times, and somehow, I was still finding small typos. There was nothing I hated more than editing my own papers. Other people’s work? No issues. I could spot an extra space or a misplaced comma in a nanosecond. The same rules didn’t apply when I was proofreading my own work but I was determined to have this paper finished by tonight.
Nicole had made me promise to not stay up too late working on this assignment, but she was also out clubbing right now which meant she would be none the wiser. The sound of my stomach growling pulls me back into reality. The last time I looked at the clock it was 7 p.m. and I convinced myself I could handle another thirty minutes of work before eating dinner. It was currently 9:45 p.m. and I had yet to eat dinner. Classic tunnel vision.
In an effort to improve my quality of work, I decide to feed my needy body. And hopefully, brain. I search through my now not-completely-empty fridge for something I can throw together quickly. Breakfast for dinner is always a solid option. Imake a move to pull out the eggs and bacon when I hear a knock on my door.
“Pizza delivery.” I didn’t order a pizza….did I? Admittedly, I have been known to order takeout in a mid-work haze and forget about it until it showed up at my doorstep. Perhaps 7 p.m. Eliana had looked out for 10 p.m. Eliana. I love myself from 3 hours ago.
Throwing open the front door I glance up at the delivery guy. My first thought is that he’s hot. My second thought is that I know him. It’s crazy how the malnourished mind works. Jake Keeley is standing at my door. My nose immediately takes in the scent of melted cheese and toppings.
“I’ll take a slice or two as payment. The rest is all yours.” He extends the box out for me to take.
My eyebrows furrow together. “What are you doing here?”
