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If you want to lock down your very own soccer player under the Christmas tree, the group order opens tonight at 8 p.m. sharp!
P.S. Cohen, honey—if you’re watching… I know that bodysuit wasn’t for your grandma. ??”*
?? Top Comments
@MrsLaceyDramaQueen:Aunt Tina, order me three. One for me and two backups in case @Sebastian_ decides to come down my chimney.
@JoyceOfficial:Did you SEE Sloane’s face when Tina caught her? Redder than the lipstick. GUILTY.
@FanClubBecker_Official:WAIT. Is Sloane Heart Becker’s new girl?! I AM SCREAMING. ??
@Sebastian_:@MrsLaceyDramaQueen please stop tagging me in lipstick videos. I don’t need this.
@Lina_Rainbow:@Sebastian_ Yes you do. With that attitude, you could use a little color.
?? Facebook Group:“Chit-Chat & Chardonnay”
(7,482 members • 1,203 online)
????? Post by Maria L.:“I saw Cohen Becker buying the bodysuit. I saw it with my own eyes. The bodysuit was an XS. Tiny waist. High, perky boobs. THERE IS NO LANGUAGE MORE UNIVERSAL THAN LINGERIE.”
Top Replies:
“Becker is a chocolate bonbon filled with trauma and kink. I knew it.”
“How does Sloane even walk around town after all that deliciousness?”
“Whoever her waxer is deserves a raise and a medal.”
?? Instagram Stories — @ElmHollowGossipGirl
(Obviously unofficial. Obviously run by Mrs. Higgins.)
Story 1:
Zoomed-in photo of theSilk & Laceshopping bag in Cohen Becker’s hand.
Text:
“The contents are a size 1 cup. Guess who wears a size 1 and has an office directly across from Elm Hollow’s most famous café? ??”
???? Facebook Group:“Elm Hollow Moms”
Post by Martha G.:
“Sorry to go off-topic from the school play, but did anyone else notice that Cohen Becker’s car was parked in front of Sloane’s agency for FOUR HOURS yesterday?
