Ella sees every bit of it. Her expression twists, eyes blazing with fury and hurt. I’m grateful I shut the door when I ran to Hud, because I have a few things to say, and I’m not pulling punches.
“First off, I didn’tletHudson do anything. He decides who he is and how he shares it. That’s not up to me. But you?Youjust outed him. To me. And even though I already knew, that was still a shit move.”
Her face falters, the weight of what she’s done sinking in.
“Second, no one downstairs gives a damn. They’re drunk and laughing and half-naked in a hot tub playing a dumb game. This isn’t about you, Ella. So stop making it that way.”
“Hudson, I—”
“I’m not finished.” I cut her off. “He told you about the panic attacks. The depression. Right?”
She nods, silent now. Eyes shining with unshed tears.
“Hudson is the strongest, most selfless person I know. He carries more than anyone should, and he does it alone,because he’s afraid his pain will become someone else’s problem. His mind already lies to him enough. He doesn’t need your shit added to the pile. So if you want to talk about being a good friend, take a long look at whatyou’redoing to him.”
I don’t even realize my voice has climbed until I feel Hudson’s lips brush the skin between my shoulder blades, whispering, “Breathe.”
“I’m sorry,” I mutter into the room. It’s meant for him, and he knows. It’s in the way his arms tighten around me.
“You already knew he was gay?” Ella asks, blinking. “He told me no one else knew.”
I fight the urge to roll my eyes. Out of everything I just said, that’s what she clings to? I give Hud’s hand a gentle squeeze, a silent heads-up. He nods against my back, making me smile. We’re sharing a brain now.
I’m okay with that.
“I found out last Friday. After he gave me bubbles.”
Hudson snorts behind me, his laughter warm against my back.
“Bubbles?” Ella asks, confused.
Hud steps out from behind me, his hand slipping from my chest to rest lightly on my hip. His other arm stays looped around my waist. I lift mine and drape it over his shoulders, claiming him in a way words can’t.
Ella’s eyes ping between us, tracking every point of contact. Seeing. Processing.
Then her face shifts as her brain catches up with her eyes. She stumbles back a few steps, breath stuttering, a skinny fingerpointed at us. “No. No, you can’t be together. You just broke up with Hadley on Friday.” She grips her damp hair and starts pacing, muttering things we can’t quite catch.
“Ella,” Hudson coos, voice calm, like he’s coaxing a wild animal. “I didn’t tell you because it wasn’t fair to put you in another position where you’d have to lie. We’re not ready to tell anyone. Out of respect for Hadley.”
She stops pacing long enough to wipe away a few stray tears. She’s probably hurt that he kept this from her, especially since she was the first person he came out to.
“Sorry for freaking out,” she responds, voice steadier. “I’m too drunk—not that that’s an excuse…”
“I get it,” Hud says, pulling her into a hug that she returns. “We’ll still hang out. This won’t change anything.”
I wish it did. I’m a selfish bastard who wants Hud all to myself, and as much as I dislike Ella, I’m not going to dictate who Hud should be friends with.
“I guess being your cover is even more important now.” She pulls away from the hug, her hands still loosely around his waist.
“About that,” Hud says, his face apologetic. “I appreciate what you’ve done for me, but I don’t think it’s necessary to keep up that charade.”
She’s stoic, her eyes pinging back and forth between Hudson’s. Ella shakes her head as if to clear it, then smiles wide. “Okay! No problem. Glad I could help.” She steps away from Hudson, and I take the opportunity to step up beside him.
Hudson reaches for my hand and interlocks our fingers. I love how his hand fits in mine, like it was meant to. From his fingers to his soul. Everythingfits.
“Thanks for telling me. I’m gonna go now.” She slips out the door without another word, leaving us in the quiet.
I turn to Hudson, pulling him into a hug and burying my face in his neck. It’s been a hell of a night. All I want now is to help him rinse off the chlorine and then curl around him like armor.
