Elven clans were divided because Arion’s war—at the heart—was about claiming the mists that could swallow his enemies.
My affinity was why the elven wanted to stand against the fae again.
I was the reason Jonas never had a chance at a love of his choosing.
“Skadi.”
His voice was silk against my skin. I closed my eyes for a breath and faced him. Did he know how beautiful he was? The ink symbols of his large heart on his bare chest, his wild, tousled hair, those brilliant eyes.
I let the cold pull me back a little more.
“No.” Jonas crossed the library, hands cupping my jaw. “You stay with me, Fire. Don’t hide, not from me.”
“You should fear me.”
“I don’t.” Jonas still held my face, he pressed a kiss to my cheek, my brow. “I don’t, Skadi.”
“Foolish of you.”
“Stop it. Look at me.” With a gentle shake, Jonas urged my gaze to meet his. “Stay here, with me.”
His hands were so warm, his eyes so inviting. But what replaced the cold ached like a molten blade cutting through my heart.
I pulled away, pulse racing. “Let me go, Jonas. It is safer for everyone. Please, let me fade until it is like I was never here.”
“Like you were never part of my life?” His voice croaked. “It’s too damn late. You are my life.”
I felt every heated word, but spoke like the coldness held me prisoner. “You have the means to forget me.”
Jonas looked at me like he battled on whether he needed to kiss me or shout at me. “I don’t want to forget you.”
Damn him, what the hells was wrong with the man? He could be free of me, he wouldn’t have to sleep with one eye open now that he knew the truth.
The mask of ice shattered. “All the things she said are true. You are not safe with me. Already there is someone seeing to it you are harmed in your own walls. Alver lands are at risk, and you are vowed to the monster who destroyed the only people who loved her.”
Jonas lunged for me, caging me against the wall. He consumed mewith his weight, holding me steady. “You have not destroyed the only people who love you, Fire. I love you. I love you to the point of pain.” He placed my open palm over his rapid heart. “Let me in, Skadi.”
Emotion pinched my face. Jonas never let me go, only occasionally swiping tears off my cheeks.
“I tried, Nightmare. I tried so hard not to be something dangerous and frightening. I loved . . . I loved my mother and father, and I took them without even realizing. It was more powerful than kinship bonds!”
“But didn’t you tell me they were dead beside you? Wouldn’t your mists have taken their bodies?”
At that, I paused, but soon shook my head. “I stole the breath from their lungs, likely lost to a dream. It wasn’t intentional, but my affinity is unstable, Jonas. That is what I’ve been trying to tell you all this time.”
Jonas’s jaw went taut, but he didn’t interrupt.
“For what I had done, I thought the king would take my head after he found me. But he told me it was an accident, he told me he would help me tame the darkness. He gave me a new home. I thought maybe it was a gift from the gods, a chance to be something new. When the betrothal to Arion was arranged, I wanted to please both clans so desperately.”
I stepped out of Jonas’s embrace.
“He said everything right until he had my foolish heart in his hands.” My fingernails dug into the meat of my palms. “I thought I’d found my hero, like I read in my ridiculous books.”
“Arion?” Jonas tried to take my hand again, but I began pacing without an answer.
“I spent every night with him,” I said. “He was so gentle, so kind, and I didn’t see the ruse until it was too late.”
“Skadi, I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”
