“I missed you every minute of every fucking day. I’m sorry,” I panted as his cock slid in and out of me at the most delicious pace, each slow thrust hitting that spot inside. “You’ll never know how fucking sorry I am for breaking us.”
He grabbed my face and stared into my eyes. “I do. I know now.”
I swallowed hard, then kissed him harder. My thighs trembled as I bounced on his cock, hitting that spot again and again, each sending me into anal ecstasy in seconds. Finn could feel it too, tensing beneath me as he tried to hold back his own release while I roared his name. This time, he didn’t let me recover from the orgasm. He twisted out from under me, throwing me down on the bed and slamming inside me from behind. Hewas chasing his own release now, fucking me the way I’d been begging him to with my eyes for days. Hard, fast and passionate.
He grabbed my hips and pounded into me, making animalistic grunts and groans from behind as my body lay limp beneath him, too relaxed to give anything back. He lost all control, his thrusts powerful yet out of sync as he blindly chased his rapture with desperate urgency. The noises he tore from me were mindless cries of submission and pure fucking joy, because this was my definition of heaven.
He grabbed my hair roughly, yanking my head to the side so he could devour my mouth as he fucked me into a new reality. My cock pulsed beneath me, rubbing against the duvet with every thrust into my ass, and I knew I could come again.
“Touch yourself,” Finn finally growled, and the relief of wrapping my hand around my cock was too much, especially as I felt Finn’s heavy body seize on top of me as he came with my name on his lips. I came within three strokes, my face buried in a pillow and my hips jolting.
Finn was dead weight on top of me, but when he tried to lift himself, I grabbed his arms and wrapped them around my chest again, plastering him to my back so he couldn’t get away. I never wanted him to leave me, but yeah, that would be problematic.
“I’m crushing you,” he breathed, resting his cheek against my neck.
“I don’t care. Just two more minutes.”
We stayed like that for five minutes until I became wheezy and short of breath. He rolled, slipping out of me, and headed straight to the bathroom, as I knew he would. I smiled because it almost felt as if nothing had changed. Finn was still the same hot-as-fuck, dominant yet caring lover he’d always been.
He strolled back out with a wet flannel and smirked at me, still lying in the same position, deceased. He wiped the flannelthrough my ass cheeks, cleaning me up, then forced me to roll onto my back so he could take care of my dick.
I watched him intently the whole time, a deep ache in my heart, knowing this was what he needed to do. He’d told me years ago that there had never been anyone to take care of him after he’d been fucked by paying paedophiles and rapists. It broke my heart when he confessed that the boys had to wash and care for each other when they were brought back to Grim. He said it had become a habit, something he just had to do with a lover to make sure they were okay afterwards.
I remembered the night he admitted that, even though he felt more comfortable being a top, he loved being a bottom but never did it because he thought it meant he was fucked up for enjoying it after what he’d been through as a boy. He was scared I’d judge him for it. But once I reassured him I never would, that he was the strongest fucking person I knew and that I was in awe of him, he eventually asked if I would fuck him.
I knew at that moment I had his full trust. That I could take him however he wanted, without making him feel like a victim or judging him for liking it. He said it was healing. That I was healing. He gave me the most vulnerable parts of himself, praying I would eventually do the same, that I would find the strength to face my demons like he had. But I never got there. I let my fear control me, and in doing so, I broke his trust.
I sat up and lifted my hand to his face as he looked at me with confusion, because I had tears in my eyes.
“I’ll never be deserving of you, Finn. I know that.” He opened his mouth to argue, but I wasn’t finished. “But I love you so fucking much that I promise you, right here and right now, I will love you with every beat of my undeserving heart until it gives out and my bones turn to dust. And even then, I’ll love you in another time, in another life. It will never end. Do you hear me?No matter where we both are, or what the fuck we both do, my love for you is endless.”
He stared at me, his body taut with tension as he digested my words and the genuine feeling I poured into them, because I meant every one. I pressed my forehead against his and closed my eyes.
“I won’t ask anything of you ever again, except for this one thing. That you’ll give me another chance to love you the way you deserve.”
I opened my eyes and lifted my head to find him still staring at me. His dark pupils flicked between my blue eyes, then he slowly nodded. “Okay.”
I blinked, unable to believe I had heard him correctly. “Okay?”
He smiled at my shock. “Okay, but fuck up again and—”
“I won’t!” I shouted, diving at him and knocking him back onto the bed before kissing him. He chuckled between my kisses, trying to break away for air, but I wouldn’t let him go. I finally had him, and I’d never let him out of my sight again.
“Fuck, I love you,” I groaned, rolling on top of him.
“I love you too, you persistent fuck,” he laughed from beneath me, and my face split into the widest grin.
“Persistence pays off.”
“Yeah. Clearly.”
I suddenly jumped off him, feeling so alive with adrenaline and indescribable happiness that I had to move. I grabbed his arm and tugged him across the bed. “Get up. Shower with me. Then we’re going out.”
“Out where?” he asked. “It’s five in the morning in Italy.”
“Si, but it’s only eleven pm in New Jersey. The night is ours.”
“Can’t we just stay in bed and sleep?” he groaned, but he reluctantly followed me into the shower.
