She flung open the door and whirled to catch the knob to pull it shut.
“Wait.” The gruff shout anchored her feet to the floor.
Avery reached for her, and a thousand screaming butterflies took flight in her belly only to crash and burn as his fingers curled into his palm and lowered to his side.
She heard him swallow but couldn’t force her gaze higher than the hollow at his throat. “Howdoyou feel?”
Jo didn’t have to ask what he meant. The unspoken “about me” sent the pieces of her heart clattering against her ribs. She’d revealed too much already, but self-preservation only took her so far. Lying wouldn’t change anything.
Her lips trembled, and the words tumbled out in a constricted whisper, “Like I can’t breathe without you.”
“Then don’t go. Stay the rest of the week, so we can figure this out.”
The sob she’d been pushing down erupted, and she closed her eyes, fighting the tears, fighting the voice in her head begging her to stay. “I can’t. It hurts too much.”
Except for the breath she couldn’t catch, silence thickened the air around them, oppressive and heavy. Time slowed. Doubt crept in. Why couldn’t figuring it out be enough?
His weight shifted, and her eyes flew open as he slid the envelope into her bag then stuffed his hands in his pockets. “For when you’re ready.”
She wanted to scream that shewasready. That he was the one who wasn’t ready.
But when he didn’t say more, Jo nodded, backed into the hall, and shut the door, the quiet click sounding dismally hollow and so fucking final.
Chapter Twenty-One
Zach stood across the desk from Avery. His lips were moving, but all Avery heard was, “Blah, blah, blah…”
He sat back and scrubbed a hand over his face. Fuck, he couldn’t concentrate, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, and his mood had become as dark as Nick’s. Hell, he’d fired Zach twice in one day, but the guy stuck around, going above and beyond to help him try to find Jo. They’d hit a dead end. “I’m sorry, what?”
“You asked if Nick was back from his meeting. He’s in his office.”
“Thanks.”
“Do you need anything else before I head out?”
Avery looked at his watch. Five thirty. Zach hadn’t left that early, not even on a Friday, since…well, ever. Not that Avery blamed him. “No, have a good weekend.”
Zach turned to go.
“Zach?”
He paused at the door. “Yeah?”
“Thank you for all your help this week. I’m sorry about my shit attitude. It won’t happen again.”
“Let’s hope not,” Zach called out as he disappeared around the door.
Avery winced at the subtle warning and whirled to face the skyline, the angry dark clouds and violent thunder reminding him of his behavior on Wednesday. He’d woken up hungover,pissed, and feeling sorry for himself—a fucked up combination. Zach had taken the brunt of his bad mood.
A raise was definitely in order. Jo wouldn’t approve. Well, she would, but she’d tell him he couldn’t solve everything with money.
“Fuck, Jo.” He planted his elbows on his desk, his head in his hands. His gut twisted as it did every time he thought of her, which meant every fucking second of every fucking day.
The second Jo had shut the door, he knew he’d fucked up. He’d wanted to go after her, to find a way to convince her to stay, but he’d stuck to his decision to let her go. Hard as it was, he’d done it for her. Hurting her was the last thing he wanted to do, and he couldn’t be sure he wouldn’t.
He’d replayed all the things she’d said. More importantly, the things he suspected she’d wanted him to say. But he’d refused to lie to Jo. He wanted her. He loved being with her, talking to her, laughing with her, holding her, taking care of her. But did he love her?
Thump, thump, thump, thump. Thump, thump, thump, thump.
