I nearly groan in anticipation. “Go for it. I have a feeling I’m going to like your mouth on me regardless of what you do with it. That’s not an invitation to bite my dick, though.”
He laughs. “Noted.”
10
BREK
I slide down Voss’body, pulling his underwear as I go. He’s hard. I’m not surprised. It’s not like I couldn’t feel it against me, especially once I shoved him onto his back so I was lying on top of him. As soon as I suggested sucking his cock, his cock heard me, and if it wasn’t contained, it likely would’ve started waving.
Pick me. Pick me. I’m right here. I volunteer.
Once I have his underwear discarded, I settle between his legs and… stare.
In the few days that Voss didn’t come to me at night, I bounced between demisexual and graysexual while I did some research. The thing is, I don’t think I have an emotional attachment to Voss. Well, not in the way that it appears demisexual means. Yes, I like Voss. I care about him. There are times I get jealous, but I think that’s something different.
Actually, I think that’s likely going to challenge my aromantic inclination here soon. Yay.
Maybe I’m wrong, but to me, it doesn’tfeelas if my emotional attachment to Voss has anything to do with my sexual response to him. I can’t explain it. I don’t even entirely understand what I’m trying to articulate.
I settled on graysexual because I truly don’t think my sudden sexual responses are driven by whatever is between Voss and me. While I realize that it’s completely different, I love the fuck out of my friends. If I were going to get hard over someone, it should be one of them.
Sure, sure. Not the same thing.
In reality, I think I’m WTFsexual. That’s how I feel—what the actual fuck is up with my body? I kind of feel like throwing a tantrum because Ijustfigured my shit out and now I’m fucking confused all over again, and yeah, it makes me grumpy.
“Hey.”
My eyes snap to Voss’.
“You don’t have to.”
I shake my head, trying to push the thoughts away. “Sorry. My staring isn’t hesitation like that.”
“No?”
“No. Just my brain trying to make sense of… me.”
Voss studies me, and I turn my attention back to his cock. I wish there were a manual. Not on sucking dick, though that would be useful too. On being asexual. Like… I want details. I want columns that say, ‘this reaction applies to this, this, and this, but not this, this, or this.’ Why is that so difficult?
Voss sits up, and I have to get up on my haunches so my face doesn’t end up in his crotch. He grips my chin and pulls my face to his.
“I’m not uninterested,” I insist before he can talk.
He smiles and presses his lips to mine. “Tell me what’s going on in your head.”
“Just wondering if I should take my glasses off so you don’t cover them in cum.”
His amusement loudly says he knows that’s not what I’m thinking about. “You can stop at any time. You don’t have to do this at all.”
I sigh. “I know. Thanks.”
“What do you need?”
“Nothing that someone else can give me. I’m still wondering about my body, and I guess I got caught up in that. Seeing your dick did that.” I smirk.
Voss snorts. “I’mnotgoing to be mad if you stop. Keep that in mind.” He kisses me again and lies back again.
I wonder why this man is single. He’s so fucking sweet and thoughtful. So damn smart.
