His hands never leave my body and if he wasn’t holding onto me, I would be a puddle on the floor. Eventually, my heart rate returns to normal and my legs stop shaking. I turn in his arms, forcing his hand out of my panties, and just look at the man in front of me. He quirks a brow and sticks his middle finger, the finger that was torturing me moments ago, into his mouth.
Jesus Christ.
My core clenches as he pulls his finger out with a pop. I need to get this conversation out of the way so I can take Patrick to bed and let him have his way with me. I feel my nipples pebble at the idea of giving Patrick this part of me.
“Before this goes any farther I think we need to talk about some things.” I hate the way my voice sounds, hesitant and unsure. I’m sure about this. I’m going to tell him about my past with Loop, my insecurities and that I want this to be a serious relationship. I can see a flash of worry in his eyes and I fucking hate it.
Should I reassure him? Or should I just rip the band-aid off? My pussy wants me to skip over it all and just rip our pants off and take him for a ride but my sudden libido needs to chill the fuck out. This conversation needs to happen.
“Hey, hey, nothing bad. Can we sit down?”
I grab his hand and he entangles our fingers and we make the short walk to his couch. He’s quiet, somehow knowing I need to get this out in my own time without interruptions. He understands me like no one else. I take a fortifying breath and let it all out. I don’t bring up the texts from Loop, I don’t want him to invade this space between us anymore than he already has.
“I’ve never really done this before but I want to be exclusive with you. I mean, I’ve been exclusive. There’s been no one else for me but I’m saying I don’t want there to be anyone else for you either.” The thought of another person putting their hands on Patrick sparks a fire in my stomach and I clench my fists toattempt to keep my emotions at bay. “There’s no one else but you, Elle.” Patrick grabs one of my fists and brings it to his mouth, placing a kiss on my knuckles. “Let me get this straight, isTHEElle Warren asking me, lowly Patrick Hunt, to be her boyfriend?” His admission mixed with his teasing settles my heart.
“Yeah, yeah. Don’t make it a big fucking deal.” I elbow him in the side before he can kiss my knuckles again. “This is the biggest deal, don’t get it twisted. Of course I’ll be your boyfriend.”
Patrick’s smile is wide and dumb and perfect. This was the right choice. I take a deep breath. “There’s one more thing I need to tell you and it’s really not that big of a deal, really. Honestly, it shouldn’t even be a thing but I don’t want you to find out because one of my siblings have big fucking mouths and then you think there’s more to it then there really is. It’s really nothing but I can’t in good conscience do what I want to do with you without telling you.” I take a deep breath to continue my rambling but Patrick stops it all, cutting me off with another perfect kiss.
I’m starting to think every kiss with Patrick was going to be perfect.
“Elle, unless your confession was that you murdered someone before you picked me up at the office earlier, I won’t judge.” His smile is sheepish but his eyes show a seriousness I didn’t usually find on him. “Even if that was your confession, I’m sure they deserved it. Blink twice if I need to help you come up with an alibi.” My eyes widened, this fucking dork, of course he knew exactly what to do to break the tension that was threatening to overtake this moment.
I lean into him. I’m fighting the urge to not say anything but that’s more insecurity talking. I trust Patrick. He lays an arm across my shoulder, pulling me in while also showing hissupport. I inhale a fortifying breath, letting it out slowly, my confession following close behind.
“I’m a virgin.”
There. I said it.
It’s out in the open. No take backs or uno reverses in sight. Patrick’s quiet and I can’t make myself look at him. I chew on my lip as we sit in silence. After a lifetime, I feel him tug on my lip, stopping the assault. “Sweetheart.” That’s it. One word. One word filled with so much warmth and understanding. It feels like every cell in my body can finally breathe.
He knows and it doesn’t matter. “Can I kiss you now?” Just like that. We’ve moved on. I smile up at this man of mine. “You fucking better.” I try to infuse as much authority in my tone as possible. Patrick barks out a laugh before taking my mouth in a kiss so possessive, I feel like he’s branding me as his.
Chapter Forty-Eight
PATRICK
I’m not sure how to respond appropriately to Elle’s latest confession. She’s right, it shouldn’t matter, and it doesn’t matter to me. Am I excited that her butthole of an ex never got to experience Elle in that way? Yes. Is some caveman part of my brain thumping his chest in joy? Maybe. Is that chest thumping because it means I will be her first? And only. No, it’s not.
What I’m feeling at this moment more than anything is gratitude. Elle was obviously struggling with the idea of sharing this but seems to have trusted me enough with it. The fact that she wants to do ‘stuff’ with me after her confession makes my dick swell. I’ve been hard since we sat down after our little escapade when we walked in. It quickly deflated once Elle started telling me about her ex and her worries about starting something serious with me but now?
Now I’m worried the fabric of my shorts is going to rip if I move the wrong way. A deep breath helps clear my thoughts again. I can’t continue to imagine all the ways I was going to show Elle how much I appreciated her for sharing these hard things with me.
My gaze slides down to my grumpy goddess and I chastise myself as I see her biting the crap out of her lip and her face showing more worry than I’d ever seen on her beautiful face. I can’t stop myself from pulling her lip from between her teeth. “Sweetheart.” I don’t know if the nickname is meant to comfort or admonish but it seems like the right thing to say, her relief is instant.
Unbidden, “Can I kiss you?” Another thing that must have been correct to ask. My heart stops as she graces me with a smile. “You fucking better.” Her answer comes out like a command and something inside me snaps.
Elle’s mine.
I lean down and capture her mouth, trying to pour everything I’m feeling into this kiss. The need to possess her in any and every way I could think of taking over all logical thought.
I needed her more than I needed to breathe. Elle understood me on this level, moving from my side onto my lap without separating our mouths. Once her hot center’s resting against my hard length, her lips parts, allowing me access to explore her more thoroughly. I grip the nape of her neck, my fingers tangling in her hair. It’s so soft, I can’t wait to see it splayed out on my pillows.
My tongue explores every inch of her mouth I have access to. Too soon, she pulls away from me. I feel a growl escape me at the loss of contact, Elle’s face is flushed and her breaths are coming out in pants.
She’s a vision.
Her hair’s tousled and her eyes glassy with arousal. Her cheeks were so red—reminding me of two perfect apples—I wanted to take a bite of her. A surprised grunt escapes me when Elle starts to rock her hips, her center rubbing against me. “Too much between us.” Elle’s voice is so breathy as she works herself against me.
