“I can’t,” I said, voice barely above the hum of the engine.“It’s not that simple.”
He nodded, eyes still on the road ahead.“Maybe not.This is worse than any calculus problems we’ve had to face.But waiting isn’t going to do anything.It doesn’t fix anything.”
I didn’t respond.
He turned slightly in his seat, the dim glow from the dashboard catching the edge of his profile.“You’re overthinking it again.”
“I’m trying not to mess anything up.”
Justin didn’t look away.“You already are.”
That landed harder than I wanted it to.He wasn’t wrong.In fact, he was more right than I wanted to think about.Being around her did something to me I couldn’t quite shake.I wanted to touch her—lightly, casually, in ways that felt natural.I wanted to talk with her and hear that soft laugh she made when she was trying to hold back.To watch the way her eyes brightened when she forgot to be guarded.I wanted those moments where she relaxed enough to let herself just exist with us, without fear or apology.
And the worst part?I liked all of it.More than I should.More than I’d ever admit to any of them.
We drove the rest of the way to his place in silence.It wasn’t exactly uncomfortable, but I could sense there was a lot he still wanted to say.
When I stopped in front of his house, Justin grabbed his bag but didn’t open the door right away.“I can’t make you do anything,” Justin said slowly.“I just know what I think and feel.And Cadence, she feels more than right in a lot of ways.And you know that too.I don’t want you to miss this, to run away without giving anything a solid chance.I don’t want you regretting anything.You deserve the world too.And maybe this kind of relationship, this kind of love and support is exactly what you need to live your life.”
He stepped out into the drizzle and jogged toward the porch.The front light flickered on from his movement, soft and yellow against the wet night.
I sat there a while longer, mulling over what Justin said.Justin only gave advice when it was truly needed, when someone was being overly hardheaded.It was rare that Justin’s advice was aimed at me.It was usually with Toby and Bryan, when Seth and I weren’t able to get through to them.
I briefly rested my head against the steering wheel before getting the energy to pull back out and head home.
I knew I was approaching that moment when it’d be too late.When Cadence would be fed up with me and be over it.I just wasn’t sure anymore if I’d already crossed it or not.And I didn’t want to know if I was too late either.It terrified me to think I missed it.
Chapter Six
The next day draggedslower than any ballad that I’d ever written.Even the light through the classroom windows looked heavy, all grey clouds and drizzle lazily dripping down the misted windows.
Study hall was usually quiet this time of morning, half the students sleeping, the rest pretending to focus on their assignments.Hazel sat across from me, a colored pencil tucked behind her ear with others lying on the table, threatening to roll away from her if she didn’t pay attention.She was focused on her sketchbook, drawing her popular chibi characters.
Today’s unfortunate victim looked way too much like me, judging by the long brown hair and the guitar in her lap.
“Hey,” I said, leaning forward to peek.“You gave me glasses.”
