“I knew then he wasn’t the man I thought he was. On the day I filed for divorce, I applied to be a foster parent. It took a while, but Rhett was the first one to land here, and I haven’t looked back since.”
Emma looks at our group. None of us speak. What do you tell a bunch of teenage boys with abandonment issues?
“So, the next time someone says any of that bullshit to you, and it is bullshit by the way, feel free to do what Rhett did. Don’t go killing anyone, but if you want to defend yourself, I’m behind you. No one gets to make my boys feel small. No one gets to make my boys feel less than they are. You each determine your worth. No one else.”
Staring at my lap, I think about everything. I wouldn’t have dared talk back to anyone, let alone fight someone when I was at the Baxtroms’, my old foster family. I got sent home sick from school once and being locked in my bedroom for two days was the punishment for inconveniencing them.
“Now that that’s settled. Eat. I got extra pepperoni for you, Rhett, pineapple for you, Kash… really? And Seth and Atlas, you guys and your extra cheese. Dig in.” She stands and grabs a couple of slices of pizza before giving us a look when we don’t move. “Eat. Seriously. I’ll even let you guys pick a movie to watch while we eat ice cream.”
That was Emma’s fix for everything over the years. Comfort food and support. She’d say her piece, then we’d eat, and that was it. Seeing some of my favorites are on the counter, and given the time, I know I’m in trouble. I know one of the guys snitched me out, but which one?
“Who was it?” I ask her, getting straight to the point.
“It doesn’t matter. But if you must know, it was Kash,” she admits. “He’s disappointed in you, and truthfully, so am I. Atlas, I raised you better than this. Granted I only got a few years with you, but you sure as shit didn’t learn that behavior from me,” she adds with a pointed look.
Emma stares at me like she’s looking into my soul.
“Talk,” she orders as she grabs the container of ice cream, brownie pieces, and a bowl.
“How’d you know I’d drop in?” I ask as I sit, pulling my beanie off.
She gives me a look of exasperation and shakes herhead. “Because I know you, duh. When you feel lost or don’t know what to do, you boys always end up back here. Would it hurt you to visit without having a problem? It gives a girl a complex.”
I snort. “Yeah, you have a complex like I’m the friendliest guy in the room.” I’m stalling, and she knows it. Sighing, I admit, “I don’t know where to start.”
“Start at the beginning.” She slides the bowl she was preparing toward me. I take in the heaping pile of ice cream, brownie pieces, and whipped cream, my stomach curdling a bit. Taking a small bite, I pass it back to her. Emma uses her spoon to grab some. “You have until we finish this, and it better be good.”
“Her name is Cora,” I start.
“Is she cute?”
Fucking gorgeous.“What’s that matter?”
“Okay. So, she’s cute. What about her?”
I sigh. Of course she’d make her own conclusions. “She seems off. She works for us part-time and is friendly with everyone, but I don’t like it.” Emma slides the bowl back to me, and I take a large bite, stalling for time. She smirks at me.
“Your brothers have spoken highly of her, ya know?”
“Why would they tell you about her? They shouldn’t be talking about her.”
“They didn’t tell me about it so much as Rhett made fun of Kash for crashing and burning when she turned him down.”
A scowl mars my face before I can stop it. Emma looks at me with a big smile. “So, she’sreallypretty then. Interesting. What does she like?”
“I don’t know.”
“What does she enjoy doing?”
“I don’t know.”
“How does she take her coffee? Does she drink hot chocolate? Does she like the beach, or does she prefer camping?” she presses.
“I don’t know!” I shout. “I don’t know, okay?” It burns me, but I don’t know the answers to those questions. I only know that she’s gota lightness to her, and I’m drawn to it. I want it for myself, but I don’t want her to lose it either.
I don’t want her to become tainted like me. The idea that I could cause her to lose the bright parts of herself I see so easily, destroys what’s left of my soul.
“That’s what I thought. You think you have the pretty girl all figured out, right?” She shakes her head. “I expected this from Seth, which he knows by the way, so feel free to tattle, but not from you, Atlas. You’ve spent so much time blocking people out, you forget that letting people in can also be good.”
