I groan, squeezing my eyes shut and nodding. “Yeah. I am. But I can’t come on too strong, because I’ll scare her away.”
“But I mean… aren’t you engaged?” Josie asks.
I sigh. “For all intents and purposes, yes. For the public, yes. In real life? No. Not really. It was the only way I could get them to send her with me to the safe house.”
“Oh,” Andrew breathes.
“Yeah. But that doesn’t leave this room. To the world, we are engaged.”
“And I suppose proposing for real would be too much too fast?” Andrew wonders aloud.
“Waytoo much. She would run. She’s not like you two, where you knew right away. She might think that I love her, but it scares her, so shoving her feelings down is the only thing keeping her calm.”
“Hmm,” Josie ponders. Cooper chooses that moment to let out a squawk, stirring in my arms. I adjust him to rest on my shoulder, and pat his small back gently. He soothes quickly.
“You’re a natural,” Josie comments.
“I’d hope so after being around all my nieces and nephews. I bet if we were around Presley as a baby, I’d be a pro.”
“You’re probably right,” she says with a laugh.
Glancing down at the infant in my arms, I can’t help but imagine what it might be like to have a little baby of my own. One with Hannah’s eyes and freckles once they get older. The image is so real that I can’t help but want to reach out and harness it.
I bet she’d be an amazing mom. I’m not getting any younger, and I always thought I would have kids by now, but Hannah’s still young. All these things are something we need to talk about, but I’m scared to. I’ve never thought of our age difference as a hurdle for us, but the more I think about it, the more nervous I get. Age is a number, I know that, but what if we are at two completely different points in our lives?
There are too many unanswered questions, but I can’t bombard her with all of them at once. She’s already anxious about our relationship, I can’t do that to her.
“Is she coming to Sunday brunch?” Andrew asks. I’ve never missed so many brunches in my life, and I miss it. It will be so nice to get back into the routine of things.
“I’ll ask. I’d like her to, but maybe it’s too soon,” I say. We still have a few days before Sunday, so there’s time.
“When the time is right, it will work out,” Josie says comfortingly.
I can’t help but hope that she’s right. I am going to dowhatever I can to keep Hannah by my side, but I know it might take a lot of reassurance on my end. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep her.
47
HANNAH
“Imissed you so much,” Julia cries as she hugs me tightly.
“I missed you too,” I reply, hugging her back.
We sit down at the table after I hug Tiff and my grandma.
“Tell us everything,” Julia says, her eyes wide as she looks at me.
I narrow my gaze at her. I will not be telling them everything with my grandma present, and she knows that.
Tiff shoves gently at her wife. “Not everything. But what happened? Where were you?”
“I can’t tell you why we were sent away,” I say. I remember that much from the last bit of conversation last night at the station. “But we were in Missouri. We stayed with a really sweet couple who had a little cottage on their property.” I tell them everything. How Dottie taught me so many new recipes, how she reminded me of mom. I tell them about how close Thomas and I got, and how special he makes me feel.
Then, I tell them about how scared I am now that we’rehome. Julia and Tiff knew a bit about it, but they didn’t know the extent of it.
“I don’t know what to think. He told everyone we were engaged to keep me safe, but now that we’re home, does that continue? Are we actually engaged?” I let out a heavy breath as I finish.
“Hannah, talk to him,” Tiff encourages. “This is all stuff that could be answered if you talk to him.”
