I narrowed my eyes, as I’d never been near a bathtub realistically big enough for two people to share. Without missing a beat, my virus perceived the various ways I might use a small tub to catch a single lycanthrope male, and she encouraged me to take advantage of the situation.
The CDC did not play nicely, and if I figured out who had gotten the bright idea to want to partner me with Wayne, we’d have a long chat about their bad idea of a joke. We came from entirely different worlds, and I didn’t even like lycanthropes. I did like my virus, but only because she’d busted her furry ass to keep me alive.
I also liked she did her best to warn me against the bad lycanthropes.
Her interest in Wayne Barnes might be the end of me, though. Or at least the end of my status as a proud single woman.
Wayne opened the door to our room, holding it for me and gesturing for me to go inside first. Since becoming a lycanthrope, I’d mostly dodged hotels, as we paid higher rates for them due to the high risk of leaving fur in the room, a tendency to destroy things, and then potential for late-night howling. The few times I’d left Long Island long enough to need to sleep somewhere, I’d pulled over at a rest stop to catch a few winks before going on my way.
I’d never been in such a nice hotel room before. Hell, I’d never been in such a nice house before. From a leather sofa in the living room to a glass coffee table destined to break if I looked at it wrong, it took contemporary comfort to its limits, while offering an inviting atmosphere and excessive air conditioning.
My virus loved air conditioning, even in winter. She had an easier time convincing me to wear my fur coat when the air had a brisk bite to it.
Crisp winter air gave her ideas, and she liked our current situation.
“Is this really a hotel room? I think it’s bigger than my apartment.”
“It’s bigger than your apartment. Just wait until you see the bathroom.”
With the choice of three doors, I poked my head into the nearest one to discover the bathroom, which was easily the same size as my apartment with room to spare. The so-called spa bathtub had jets, the faucet was a thin, narrow plate that would cascade into the tub, and the ledge left plenty of room for a full-course dinner and then some. Two could fit without touching each other, and my virus had a lot of ideas about what two could do in it while indulging in a lot of touching. The presence of two shower doors puzzled me, and I stepped inside to discover one was for a massive shower and the other led to a bathroom within the bathroom with a second sink and the toilet. “What the fuck is this?”
“A luxury bathroom. Do you like it?”
Under no circumstances would I cry because I could live in the bathroom without a single regret. “There’s a bathroom in the bathroom.”
“Won’t it be nice if those idiots try something here and have to pay for this bathroom?”
“Do I want to know how much a bathroom like this would cost?”
“Probably thirty or forty thousand,” he admitted, stepping into the bathroom and gesturing to the tub. “I’ve put several tubs like this into some of the apartments I manage, and they’re at least five thousand a pop fully installed. They crank my insurance premiums up, too, because they can do a lot of damage if something leaks and nobody catches it. I actually install special sensors beneath all the tubs like this to detect excess moisture. I put a sensor near all common failure points. That saves somewhat on the insurance bills, as the insurance companies reward those who try to limit their claims as much as possible. It’s a lot cheaper to fix a minor drip than it is to fix a busted pipe.”
I sighed at my furry self. “My fur will clog the whole thing up.”
Wayne shook his head and gestured for me to join him at the tub. He pointed at the drain which had a mesh cup over the hole. “This model is made specifically for fuzzballs like us. The fur gets caught in that when it drains. If it gets full before it’s done draining, we engage the stopper, clean out the fur, and drain it again. The intakes for the jets also have fur catches, so we just have to clear those now and then and we’re good. A little extra work, but we can enjoy the tub, too. That’s part of why they’re more expensive.”
“If they try anything, and they damage this room, I will beat them within an inch of their lives,” I growled.
“I’m sure they’ll try something, I’m sure the room will be damaged, and that’s fine. You can beat them within an inch of their lives. Try to avoid killing them, but should you, well, that’s fine.”
“But why me?”
“You’re a single hybrid lycanthrope. Being a single lady hybrid lycanthrope? You’re a treasure. Most packs have to wait decades before a mated woman develops the virus enough to transform. Lycanthrope ladies able to shift significantly strengthen a pack. As the men often outnumber the ladies, and most children of lycanthropes are boys, the ladies are in high demand.”
I’d been warned single lycanthrope men lost their minds around single female lycanthropes, but seeing it was believing. Rather than tell Wayne he’d fallen completely off his rocker, I prowled through the rest of the suite, discovering it had an office and a single bedroom.
Either one of us would be sleeping on the couch or we’d be sharing a bed.
My virus knew which she preferred, and she wanted a hit of pixie dust so she could enjoy it even more. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at my virus’s less-than-subtle hints.
“Don’t push your luck, Barnes.”
“But I want to push my luck. If I push my luck, I might strike gold.”
“Or you might get your ass kicked.”
“But will you stick around if you kick my ass hard enough?”
Lycanthropes. Glaring at him resulted in him smiling, another loss for me and a win for my uppity virus. “You’re something else.”
