Anna’s Bassett hound, Huckleberry, who I hadn’t even realized was there until this moment,took that as an invitation to join in. “Aaaarooooooooooo,” he howled.
“Fo-shiz, get your woman off me!” Ash bellowed, running circles around Mom and Dad to get away from Bimbo.
I glanced back at Christy about to apologize but she was doubled over, arms around her middle, laughing so hard tears were rolling down her beautiful cheeks. Her gaze flitted to her parents and she laughed even harder. They looked utterly mortified. Christy was going to dump me. She might be laughing now, but as soon as they got her alone, they were going to make her see sense.
“Oh my gosh, I can’t breathe.” She exhaled. “I love you people so much. I can’t wait to be a Dupree.”
“Thank goodness for that,” I muttered with a chuckle.
Blue hung out of the window, waving goodbye. Anna grabbed his hand, trying to keep the entire car from leaving with that one grasp. Of course, it didn’t work. Blue’s jerkwad dad took off so fast the tires spit gravel and Fate ripped their hands apart. Once they disappeared, Anna hiccuped her way back to us, Lemon’s arm around her.
Mom’s hands were to her heart. Lemon, Silas, Mom, and Dad surrounded Anna, petting her like a dog about to be put to sleep. Even Christy looked like she was fighting the urge to run over and pull poor Anna into her arms. Now I felt like a jerk. Like somehow I should’ve planned this on a day when Anna’s heart wasn’t cracking open. Like I could’ve known.
But here we were, everyone watching expectantly.
“Are we ready?” I asked.
“Oh my word, yes. Please hurry,” Ashton said, slapping Bimbo’s hands away. I didn’t know if she was high. I hadn’t thought so before, but she clearly thought he was throwing down a challenge. The more he fought her off, the more aggressive she got. Just then she grabbed Ash’s head, stuck her tongue out, and licked him from chin to forehead.
“Gah!” he yelled. “Mom, help!” He shoved her face away, palming it like a basketball.
“Hey!” Ford thundered, tripped over his guitar, righted himself, and then took off for them. “Get yer haaaands off her!” He full-body tackled Ashton to the ground.
Christy slapped her thigh, the laughs coming so hard she couldn’t even make a noise.
“Get off me, you freaking nutter!” Ashton yelled at Ford.
“You have got to be kidding me,” I said.
Silas was already on it.
But before he could get there, Mom stepped over, grabbed Ford by the ear, and twisted it until he was her paralyzed puppet. “What is wrong with both of you?” she exploded. “Holden is trying toproposeand you two are rolling around like you were raised in a barn!”
“Mom!” Ford yelled. “My ear!” His words were suddenly clear as day. Then he let out the loudest belch I’d ever heard—didn’t even know a noise like that could come out of a human being—and puked all over the ground.
Lemon covered her nose with a gasp.
Ford heaved again, and it spattered on Silas’s shoes. Silas swore, which made Christy’s mom let out an appalled squeal.
All this time, Mom had never let go of Ford’s ear. Pretty sure from her fury that she took vomiting as a personal affront. She twisted harder, forcing Ford to a bent-over stand. “You take this…” She glowered at Bimbo. “Person, back to the house. And drink at least three cups of coffee. You better be in your right mind by the time I get back, do you understand me, Ford Sutton Dupree?”
“But Holden wanted me here,” Ford whined. The puking seemed to have sobered him up. Or maybe it was the ear twisting.
Mom looked at me, eyes blazing as if to say,do you still want him here?
I shook my head. “Just go, Ford. You’re not going to remember it anyway.”
Anna’s continual background sobs gutted me. This whole thing was a disaster.
I looked back at Christy.Mybeautiful Christy. She deserved so much better than this. “Maybe we should do this another day.”
She leaned down and booped me on the nose. “No way. Don’t even think about it. This is amazing. We’re going to have the best story to tell our kids.” I smiled at her, so stupid in love. Because that right there was precisely why she was going to be the mother of my children.
Ford stomped over to his guitar, swiped it off the ground, and stormed back to Bimbo. Grabbed her by the hand and yanked her toward the side-by-side.
“And don’t you go anywhere near the bedrooms!” Mom yelled just before they rode away.
Anna hiccuped another sob.
