The way Madden felt about hockey was how I felt about football. Cheering fans, the wind at my back, my pass soaring through the air? There was nothing else in the world as exhilarating.
My gut twisted…because that wasn’t true. I’d experienced something like it once before. Something even better. But it wasn’t a sport that had done it.
It was Anna.
She’d made me feel like that, every single day of my sophomore year of high school. And I’d been chasing that high ever since. I’d had it all, right there in my hands, and instead of staying put—instead of following my instincts—I’d let my dad talk me into heading for the West Coast.
I rubbed circles against my temples, remembering the day my dad drove me away from Seddledowne, Virginia, four and a half years ago. An image of Anna sobbing as she watched me go flashed into my mind. Gorgeous Anna with her chocolate brown hair and eyes the exact same color.
I needed to stop going there. If I quit welcoming the memories, I might get over her finally. No. My fist pounded against my temple. Iwasover her. I’d dated plenty of girls since Anna. I wasn’t sitting around pining. I’d lived my life. Made my choices. But still. She was the one I always came back to in my mind. The one I compared every girl to, and they always fell flat.
My head dropped into my hands again. I closed my eyes and let the memory take me. I was there on that last day, the last time I’d laid eyes on her. The tears, the desperation, the hurt in her eyes. It was seared into my memory like one of the Duprees’ branding irons. I shouldn’t have left her. Especially because she’d lost her mom to cancer the year before. Gah! I’d been so stupid to think it would work being that far apart. We were so young. So naïve. I’d regretted it every day since we broke up. All I could do was think of what might have been. I hated being that guy. I would not live in the past and become bitter like my dad.
Clang!
My eyes flew open just as Brion slammed DeShawn into the locker in front of me. DeShawn had Brion’s phone in his hands. “Bro got a side piece! Wait until Faith finds out.”
Brion swore at him, reached for the phone, and they took off again.
That’s when I realized my phone was buzzing. Dad. He’d texted three times and called once while I’d zoned out.
Dad
We’re watching game tape as soon as you’re done. Head over to my place.
Blue?
BLUE. ANSWER ME. We have things to talk about. Like how you let that pecker sack you.
I exhaled and punched out a message.
I can’t. I’ve got plans. We’ll watch tape tomorrow.
Then I headed out of the locker room and down the hall to Madden’s car. I was going to get it for brushing Dad off but I couldn’t deal with him right then. I walked out into the cool evening air. The crowds were long gone and the reporters, thank goodness.
Madden had the door of the ’Vette open, waiting. I slid into the leather passenger seat and jammed my bag under my feet. The luxury car air diffuser sent citrus-scented puffs straight up my nose, almost making me forget I’d grown up dirt poor. Madden hit the gas so fast my head sucked back against the headrest.
Madden was an only child and his nanny had raised him. Everything about him said money. The Jordan retros he was wearing that were probably worth more than my hand-me-down sedan. The Rolex on his wrist. His parents’ house that put most celebrities to shame.
“You think any more about it?” Madden asked as he turned the radio down. He kept teasing me about quitting football for hockey. Such a joke. I could barely skate. But he was seriously considering it and I think he was nervous about doing it alone.
I pushed my bangs out of my eyes. I needed a trim. “Nah, man.” I cracked a grin. “Imma stick with football.”
“Don’t blame you.” He downshifted as he entered a turn. “If I had half the talent you have in your little finger, I would head straight for the draft.” He upshifted, gassing it again. “Not all of us can go pro.”
“Oh, I think you’ll be going pro.” I winked. “Maybe not in football though.”
My phone buzzed in my pocket and I slipped it out.
Silas Dupree:
So Clem says I should go to the game at VT. She says I need to get out of the house. I think she’s sick of my hovering. I’ll see if there are any tickets left and if the guys want to go. I’ll let you know. Ashton will probably make us sit on the VT side and wear all orange and maroon though. You’ve been warned
.
My entire body relaxed and a chuckle of relief took over. There was hope.
I’ll forgive the worst school colors of all time as long as we meet up after.
