“Walk away from f-football?” I spluttered.
“Wrong.”
A massive exhale released from my lungs. People would lose their minds. My dad, my coaches, Daisy Foxhorn and the rest of the UK staff. All of America. To give up football for a girl would make me a laughing stock for the rest of my life and for good reason. There were so many people counting on me.
Brooklyn continued, “Not gonna happen. Anna would never let you do that.”
My stomach relaxed a bit. Until I realized it fixed nothing. “Then what?”
“What do you think I am? A fortune teller? Your love guru? God?”
“Why didn’t you call and tell me this earlier?”
“I wanted to. Anna made me swear not to. But since you called me, all bets are off."
I went back to scratching Huck on the head, trying to calm the emotional tornado going on inside. “I never should have left in high school. It screwed everything up.”
“How would that have fixed anything? You’d still be right here in this spot. You’re destined for greatness on the football field. She’s destined for greatness in a vet’s office somewhere. Preferably Dr. Atkins’s office in Seddledowne with her name plate on the desk. You were gonna come to this crossroads regardless.”
Was this girl trying to break me? “Are you saying we aren’t meant to be?”
“Again, not God. Just Brooklyn over here. And Anna would kill me if she found out I was saying this but, you two are headed in different directions. Those are the facts and I don’t know how you’re going to reconcile it. But I need you to. Anna needs you to.” A male voice next to her whispered something incoherent. Probably Jonah. “I gotta go, Control-Alt-Delete. Good luck.”
She hung up.
I forced myself to stand. Then I walked out, feeling like I weighed a hundred pounds more than when I’d walked in. My lungs wouldn’t expand all the way and it took actual effort to roll my shoulders back and stand upright. Anna was gone from her spot on the couch. I heard clanging in the kitchen and walked in to find her putting her rinsed bowl into the dishwasher.
“Hey.” I stepped up behind her and slid my hands around her concave stomach. “Did you eat all of it?”
Her hand hooked around the back of my neck and slid into my hair. “Mhmm. Yep.” There was a slight inflection in her tone that told me she was lying.
But I didn’t have it in me to call her out on it. My arms were heavy and my lungs physically hurt. I turned her toward me and lifted the dishwasher closed behind her with my toes. Then I squared her hips with mine. Her dark eyes pulled me in and I tipped my forehead against hers.
Tell her you want to watch her realize her dreams. Tell her you love her too much to hold her back anymore.Tell her you’ll let her go, if that’s what she wants.
My mouth opened. “I…I love you,” I whispered and I hated myself. Because apparently it was a lie. At least, according to Brooklyn. If I loved her more than I loved myself I would let her live her dreams. But I couldn’t. I needed her too much.
I was so weak.
“I know. I love you too.” She pushed up and kissed me.
CHAPTER 28
anna
Shane
Let's be honest. Your plans don't align with his. You'll be off at vet school, and he'll be traveling with the team. How long before the strain of long distance starts affecting his performance? Do you want that on your conscience? Do you really want to live with the guilt of letting his dreams fall apart? He’s always supported you. You can’t do this for him?
CHAPTER 29
anna
My hand ran along the top wire on the high tensile fence by Momma’s grave at Dupree Ranch. I glanced over at Mom, her marble headstone bright in the distance, even against the cold, gray winter sky. “Hey, Momma,” I whispered but I didn’t stop. Dr. Atkins was in the barn, treating an abscess on Fred, Gramps’s old quarter horse, and he’d asked me to assist. But as I walked past my mom’s final resting place, I felt her absence as deeply as when she’d first passed.
Momma had done her best, making sure Lemon and Silas were my “parents” after she went. But sometimes, a girl really needs to talk to her mom and only her mom. I’d felt it keenly over the last few weeks.
I loved Blue. All the way to my core. Somehow I just knew I was supposed to be with him. That we belonged together. But there was another part of my soul that was fighting against giving up vet school. I’d told myself over and over to let it go. Blue was more important. But I couldn’t completely shake it from my system.
