The parlor door swung open and Emily startled at the sound, turning toward it. There, framed by the warm glow of the firelight, a familiar figure stepped into the room—Nicolas, bringing with him the scent of bay rum and pine.
Emily’s heart slammed against her ribs, her breath catching as her fingers froze above the piano keys. Surely she was imagining this. “Nicolas,” she said, her voice a mere whisper.
Mathew wrapped his hand around her arm. “Mother, who is he?”
“He is a friend…” Emily’s voice trailed off as the room erupted into a flurry of surprised exclamations and greetings, but Emily remained frozen in place, her gaze locked with Nicolas’s. He moved toward her, a soft smile playing on his lips.
“My dear Lady Fairchild,” he said, his tone playful yet tinged with an undercurrent of genuine emotion.
Emily’s cheeks flushed, her heart pounding a wild rhythm.
“Mr. Winters,” she said, her voice steadier than she felt. “What a... surprise.”
There was no way her letter could have reached him before yesterday and he would not have been able to travel from London so fast. It could only mean one thing. He must have come of his own accord. But why?
Nicolas’s smile widened. “I do so love to keep everyone on their toes.”
As their eyes locked, Emily teetered on the edge of hope and uncertainty, torn between the joy of his unexpected return and the fear of what it might mean. Would Nicolas’s presence bring the happiness she longed for, or would it lead to more heartache?
Twelve
The heavy oak door of the parlor closed with a resounding thud, the sound echoing through the room like the toll of a bell, sealing them in. Beatrice and Charlotte’s soft reassurances to Mathew faded into the hallway, leaving only the thick silence between Emily and Nicolas.
Emily stood frozen by the window, fingers clenched at her sides, as if tethering herself to the ground. Every fiber of her being screamed for her to close the distance between them, to feel his arms around her once more. Yet, fear held her back, an invisible wall she was not ready to breach. The very air seemed to crackle with tension, the only sound the fall of his boots against the plush Aubusson carpet as he approached.
“Emily...” Her name fell from his lips, the deep resonance of his voice wrapping around her, pulling her into its warmth even as she resisted. Her heart stuttered in response, betraying the fragile hold she had on her emotions. She willed herself to remain still, unwilling to face him, to see the regret etched upon that achingly handsome face.
She both longed for and feared his apology because she could not be certain what he was sorry for. Her heart would break anew if he shared regret over the time they spent together. But if he had come to declare his love… If he wished to express regret over the callous way he had left her… She pressed her eyelids closed and fought to maintain composure.
He halted a mere foot away, close enough that she could feel the heat radiating off his body, smell the hint of bay rum that always clung to his skin. “Emily, please. Look at me.”
She blew out a measured breath, then turned, slowly, deliberately, lifting her chin in silent defiance even as her treacherous heart hammered against her ribs. His eyes blazed with intensity, the lines of his face drawn in contrition.
“I owe you more than an apology,” he began, his voice thick with emotion. “What I did... leaving you that way... it was unforgivable. I let my fear control me, and in doing so, I hurt the one person I can not live without.”
Her breath hitched, anger and hurt swirling within her. She wanted to cling to her righteous indignation, but his words chipped away at her defenses, leaving her exposed, raw. Emily searched his face, torn between the pain he had caused and the overwhelming love she felt.
She had spent countless nights replaying their last hours together, dissecting every word, every gesture, searching for some glimmer of the affection she had once been so sure he held for her. And now he was here. Standing before her. Declaring his feelings.
Nicolas took a tentative step closer, his hand lifting as if to touch her cheek before falling back to his side. “I was a fool, Emily. A coward. I did what I have always done without realizing how deep my affection for you ran. I disappeared without a farewell, convinced that I was unworthy of you, that I would only bring you pain. But in my haste to protect you, I realize now that I inflicted a far greater wound.”
Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes, her vision blurring as a maelstrom of emotions swirled within her breast. The hurt, the anger, the love and longing—all warred for dominance, threatening to overwhelm her.
“Can you ever forgive me?” he whispered, his voice raw with vulnerability. “I know I have no right to ask for your absolution, but I swear to you, on all that I hold dear, that I will spend the rest of my days proving myself worthy of your trust, your affection...your love.”
Emily’s heart constricted painfully, the sincerity in his words, the naked emotion in his gaze chipping away at the walls she had erected around her battered heart.
As if sensing her internal struggle, Nicolas closed the remaining distance between them, his hands gently grasping her trembling fingers. The warmth of his touch sent a shiver down her spine, and she instinctively leaned into his proximity, drawn by the magnetism that had always existed between them.
“Emily,” he breathed, his voice a reverent caress. “You have changed me in ways I never thought possible. Your strength, your compassion, your unwavering grace—they have shown me what true love really means. You have become the very center of my world, the beating heart that gives my life purpose and meaning. I am lost to you. Completely and irrevocably in love with you.”
His words washed over her like a soothing balm, easing the ache that had taken root in her soul. In the depths of his gaze, she saw a reflection of her own longing, a yearning for a love that transcended all boundaries.
“I love you, Emily Fairchild.” His voice was soft yet filled with the weight of a million unspoken promises. “I love you with every part of me—more than I thought myself capable of. You are my light, my heart... and I was too blind to see it before… I love you with every fiber of my being, with a passion that burns brighter than the stars themselves. I know I have made mistakes, that I have caused you pain. But I swear to you, I will spend the rest of my life making it right. If you will have me, I promise to cherish you, to support you, to be the man you deserve by your side.”
Emily’s throat constricted, her heart racing as the weight of his declaration settled upon her. She searched his face, seeking the truth behind his words, and found only pure, unadulterated love shining back at her. It was a love that promised healing, that offered a chance at a future she had once thought lost forever.
She closed her eyes, drawing in a shaky breath as she wrestled with the decision that lay before her. To forgive, to give her heart once more, was to risk the very fabric of her being. But to turn away, to deny the love that burned so fiercely between them, would be to condemn herself to a lifetime of regret and longing.
