“Have you conveyed your feelings to him? Told him what you want out of your union?” Grace sat her teacup aside.
“I have not.”
“Men make the absolute worse mind readers, dear. They do try, but generally fail miserably. It is up to us ladies to ensure our needs are known.” Grace gave a sympathetic grin.
Jane pondered Grace’s words. Would it make a difference if she told Caleb what she desired?
Caleb tried his best to focus on the estate ledgers. Still, thoughts of Jane continued to surface. He could not help but wonder if she were thinking of him as well. Had her ire cooled? Would she welcome him home when he returned? Did she wish for him to return, or had she settled into her own pattern of life separate from him?
It was not all that uncommon for married couples to keep separate residences. Generally they procured an heir and spare first, but all the same, such arrangements were accepted among society’s elite. Wariness settled within him. Did Jane wish for such an arrangement?
He closed the account ledgers, shaking away the thoughts. A sennight had passed since he left for Highlawn Park and there remained much to do. If he wished to return to London anytime soon, he needed to stop dwelling on things he could do nothing about at present.
Caleb made his way to the stables and ordered his stallion saddled and the estate steward summoned. He would inspect the outbuildings today and if his streak of luck held, he would find them in good repair as he had the manor house. Father may not have been managing things properly, but it seemed he had an able steward.
Sitting astride his horse, Caleb waited for the steward, Mr. Zeal to join him. He squinted against the bright rays of the sun, looking out at the vast estate that now belonged to him. He paused when his gaze landed on a willow tree in the distance.
He and Maggie used to play in and around the old tree. In their later years, after mother left, they would seek safety within the cover its long branches provided.
“Catch me if you can.” Maggie giggled as she ran toward the tree. Her blond curls bounced about her shoulders, coming loose of their pins as she raced across the lawn.
Caleb laid chase, calling after her. “Ladies do not run you little hoyden.”
“I have no wish to be a proper lady.” She returned as she darted into the long, dropping branches of the willow tree.
He entered the trees shelter in time to watch her scampering up its wider branches to perch against the trunk. “What makes you say such a thing, Mags?”
She smiled down at him. “There is little fun in propriety. Ladies do not run nor do they climb trees. They are expected to obey and behave at all times. For heaven’s sake, ladies are not even permitted to have brains.”
“You will change your mind when you get older.” He said, with confidence. “Eventually, you will wish to marry.”
“Never.”
Caleb chuckled to himself at the memory. Maggie had been such a spirited girl. He had no doubt that if given the chance she would have blazed a trail through society both as a lady and a hoyden. Sorrow crept in causing a lump to form in his throat. If only he would not have allowed her to cross the blasted river.
“Your Grace.”
Caleb turned toward his approaching steward. “Mr. Zeal.” He nodded. “Let us start at the summer house. Along the way you can fill me in on any repairs that you already know are needed.”
Mr. Zeal nudged his horse, following Caleb. “The late duke gave me full run of the estate, but the budget he provided for upkeep was rather small. I have done my best, electing to keep up the main buildings at the expense of others. The manor house and stables received the most care.”
“I wish to take an active hand in the estates running. Rather than providing a budget for upkeep, you are to submit reports to me. After which I will evaluate the need and pay for the expenses.”
Mr. Zeal nodded. “You will find the summer house in need of exterior repairs. The interior has been maintained rather well.”
The house came into view, causing another memory to slam into Caleb, twisting his gut with long ago forgotten disgust.
At the sound of mother’s screams, Caleb drew near. The breathy sound emanated from the summer house. Certain she was in need of aide, he quickened his pace. “Mama.” He threw open the door then froze.
Mother leaned back on a chaise, her bodice pulled down to reveal her breasts and skirts pushed up to her waist. A man rutted between her thighs, but it was not father.
Her cold glare met him and she narrowed her eyes.
Caleb fled from the house not at all sure what to do. Later, Mother came to him and scolded him for spying.
“I thought you were hurt. I was not spying, mama. I came to save you.”
Her face reddened and eyes narrowed in furry. “Stop your lying.” She boxed his ears. “The worst mistake I ever made was marrying and giving birth.” She stormed away leaving him alone and confused.
