Too much. Suddenly it was all too much - the intimacy, the wanting, the newness of his own desire. Connor pulled back, overwhelmed but not in a bad way. Just...full. Like his chest couldn’t contain everything he was feeling.
“Thank you,” Connor managed.
Leyden’s brow furrowed. “For what?”
“Trusting me.” Connor gestured vaguely at Leyden’s naked body. “Letting me look. Letting me figure this out without…” He swallowed again. “Without pushing.”
“Connor.” Leyden’s hand came up to cup Connor’s face, thumb brushing his cheekbone. “You should know by now, I’d stand here all day if that’s what you needed.”
Connor believed him. Through the bond, he felt Leyden’s sincerity - the patience that ran bone-deep, the willingness to give Connor whatever time he required.
“I should let you get dressed,” Connor said, even though part of him wanted to keep looking, keep touching, keep exploring this new awareness of his body. But he was learning he still had limits and while he’d made a huge leap forward in the intimacy stakes, he was also aware he had a lot further to go.
Leyden smiled, slow and warm. “Probably. I have a conference call in twenty minutes.”
He bent to retrieve the towel, and Connor’s gaze tracked the movement helplessly. The flex of muscle, the shift of skin. Even that simple action made heat bloom in Connor’s chest.
Definitely attraction. No question now.
Leyden caught him staring and raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes. “See something you like?”
“Yeah.” Connor’s face burned, but he didn’t look away. “I really do.”
/~/~/~/~/
That night Connor couldn’t sleep, and the ceiling wasn’t offering him any solutions or suggestions. Leyden breathed evenly beside him, seemingly unaware of Connor’s conundrums.
The issue was - in Connor’s opinion – that for the first time in his life his brain had seen someone he really liked, and now he couldn’t stop constantly churning over the images his helpful brain had captured. And it wasn’t just the visuals. Connor’s brain had cataloged everything from Connor’s feelings, the scents he remembered, and even the restraint in Leyden’s voice.
I want to do it again.
The realization wasn’t a big surprise. What surprised Connor was theintensityof the wanting. He’d morphed from abstract curiosity into an actual desire to touch Leyden’s chest, his arms, his back...and so much more.
Connor’s thoughts drifted further – things he’d never considered when thinking about another person before. What would it feel like to kiss Leyden’s shoulder? To press his mouth against that claiming bite and taste his mate’s skin?
Heat coiled low in Connor’s stomach.
He shifted slightly, trying to ignore the growing hardness in his sleep pants. The hard-on wasn’t unusual - Connor’s cock worked the same as most men’s. But this time it felt different. Before, arousal had been a biological function, disconnected from any specific person or scenario.
Now, his arousal was because of Leyden. It came from just thinking about running his hands down Leyden’s stomach, feeling those abs flex beneath his fingers. About the way Leyden had looked at him with gray eyes, full of heat but being patient, too. About the trust in standing there completely exposed, vulnerable, waiting for Connor to decide what he wanted.
Connor bit back a groan. His cock pressed insistently against the fabric of his pants. It had the cheek to demand attention. That was new as well. But acknowledging his dick’s demands meant acknowledging what caused it, and that felt…monumental.
Desire. Real, specific, person-focused desire. Something Connor couldn’t ignore.
He carefully slid out of bed, moving quietly so he wouldn’t wake Leyden. Through their bond, he sensed his mate sleeping deeply, exhausted from patrol earlier.
In the bathroom, Connor locked the door and leaned against it, breathing hard. His reflection stared back from the mirror—flushed face, dilated pupils, obvious bulge in his pants.
His research in the forum posts had taught him demis experienced attraction differently. Some felt it gradually. Some felt it intensely once the emotional connection formed. Some never felt physical desire at all, and that was valid too.
Connor had stopped hoping he’d be one of the ones who eventually felt it. It was safer for him to assume he wouldn’t, to build his life around that reality.
But now…
He shoved his pants down and took himself in hand, closing his eyes. Immediately, images flooded his mind. Leyden dropping the towel, trusting him completely. The width of his shoulders, the definedVof muscle leading down to…
Connor’s hand moved faster, slick with precome. He imagined touching Leyden there, wrapping his fingers around…
