Pack duties. He needed to focus on pack duties.Look at how much I get done when I’m not having sex all the time.Yes, Leyden’s inner self could be a sarcastic bastard at times.
The morning passed in a blur of emails and phone calls. Leyden approved supply orders, reviewed Matthew’s transition notes for the third time, and scheduled interviews with more enforcer candidates Connor had vetted. Normal, mundane tasks that should’ve kept his mind occupied.
Instead, he kept glancing toward the window.
Around eleven, movement in the training yard caught his attention.
Connor stood in the center of the combat ring, shirtless, demonstrating a takedown technique for Janet and two other potential enforcers. Sunlight gleamed off the sweat coating his shoulders, highlighting every ridge and valley of muscle as he moved. His body was a sexy weapon - controlled, precise, devastating.
Beautiful.
Connor pivoted, caught his opponent’s arm, and flipped the larger man onto his back in one fluid motion. The movement made his abs contract, drawing Leyden’s gaze down the sharp lines of his mate’s torso to where his jeans hung low on his hips.
Leyden’s mouth went dry.
Connor said something Leyden couldn’t hear, gesturing for Janet to try the technique. He stepped back, arms crossed over his chest, watching with the same intense focus he brought to everything.
Completely in his element. Confident. Powerful.
Leyden’s cock stirred despite the cold shower taken mere hours before.
He jerked away from the window, heart pounding.
Christ. He couldn’t stand there like some creep getting aroused by his mate doing his job.
Crossing the room quickly, Leyden locked the office door and leaned against it, willing his body to settle.
It didn’t.
His hand moved to his belt before he’d consciously decided, desperation overriding dignity. He shoved his pants down just enough, wrapped his fist around his aching cock, and tried to find relief.
Connor’s face filled his mind. Those gray eyes watching him with trust, with growing affection. Connor’s rare smile, the one that made Leyden’s chest ache. The way Connor had looked after their claiming, flushed and beautiful andhis.
Leyden came hard, biting back a groan.
The pleasure faded almost immediately, leaving him empty.
He cleaned up mechanically, the hollow feeling in his chest expanding with each breath. It should’ve helped. Jerking off had always taken the edge off before, made him functional until he could find a warm body to lose himself in.
Now it just reminded him that a warm body wasn’t what he actually wanted.
Unlocking the office door, Leyden went over and sank into his desk chair, staring at nothing.
He’d fucked dozens of people over the years. Hundreds, maybe, if he counted every casual encounter since he’d first shifted. He’d prided himself on his stamina, his skill, the variety of partners who’d warmed his bed.
Thinking back, Leyden realized they all had one thing in common - none of them had ever made him feel less lonely.
They’d scratched an itch. Provided physical release and a temporary distraction. But afterward, he’d always been alone - surrounded by pack members who respected his authority, but who never reallyknewhim. Partners who wanted his body but had no interest in his thoughts, his fears, his hopes for the pack’s future.
Connor knew all that. He listened when Leyden talked about pack politics, offered insights that showed he genuinely cared about Leyden’s goals. Sat with him during meals and asked about his day like the answer actually mattered.
And Leyden still felt lonely.
Not because Connor didn’t care. Leyden shook his head. The bond made his mate’s growing affection impossible to miss. But because the physical intimacy Leyden craved remained out of reach - it might always be out of reach if Connor never developed that kind of desire...Shit.
Leyden dropped his head into his hands.
Selfish. He was being selfish and ungrateful and…
