Instantly, I know it’s the wrong thing to say. He shakes his head, his expression so full of resignation it hurts.
I’d love for him to wrap me in his arms, and maybe, if magickind was peaceful, he’d be willing to lay our futures and our hearts on the line, to try mating with me, as any normal wizard would.
But he isn’t normal. He’s a Wolvesey. And magickind is no longer peaceful.
“Stop. I won’t have you in the middle of the danger. Blackbourne will care for you. His mate passed to her afterlife without birthing a youngling, so he will cherish yours. He’s connected and powerful and?—”
“He’s not you.” My face crumbles as tears well in my eyes. “He will never mean to me what you do. He won’t make me feel desired. He won’t challenge me. He won’t make every day an adventure. He isn’t the other half of my heart.”
Raiden closes his eyes and seemingly steels himself. When he looks at me again, I see his resolve. This is our last night together. It has to be. And he intends to make every second count.
“I’m sorry, Tabby. I can’t make promises beyond tonight.” Raiden holds out his hand. “Be with me?”
Tears fall down my cheeks and I shrug. “You know where you’re concerned I can never say no.”
Raiden doesn’t reply, simply pushes his robe off my pale shoulders, unbelts it, and lets it cascade to the floor, baring my curves to his gaze.
The breath leaves his body in a rush as his stare drinks me in. “You’re so beautiful. Every time I see you, I’m reminded of that again. You’re so warm, kind, and intelligent. And the sass under all your manners is always an unexpected surprise…” He smiles before he sobers again. “I fall into you every time I touch you. I wish I never had to find my way out.”
But war demands that he does.
My chest threatens to implode.
Before tears can take over, Raiden lays me on his bed and quickly disrobes. He covers me with his hard, masculine body and captures my lips in a kiss that’s deep, desperate, consuming.
We don’t say it aloud, but the truth hangs between us: this is the end of us. That reality burns through me like fire, spreading a pain that hurts like nothing else.
In a perfect world, he would do this every night—kiss me, caress me, show me he wants me. But in this dangerous world, we only have now.
I arch up to him and close my eyes, slipping into a fantasy where I’m his—and always will be. A world where every night is filled with his love, where he swallows my sated cries with his kiss, then we fall asleep tangled together, our youngling safe in my belly and our future secure.
He deepens the kiss, claiming every inch of my mouth with a hunger that feels urgent. Imperative. As if, for one impossible heartbeat, he wants that fantasy, too. But no. I’d swear he’s branding every one of my reactions, each shiver and sigh, into his memory because he’ll never touch me like this again.
Holding back tears, I cling to Raiden as he caresses his way down my body, every stroke of his palm slow and reverent. I feel how special he wants this night to be.
The gentle way he loves me threatens to destroy me. I might mate with Sean Blackbourne and give my body to him for the rest of my days, but Raiden will always own my heart. Surely he knows that.
His hands travel slowly over me—my neck, the swells of my breasts, my hips—touches that make me sigh, that pull something tender from him in return. His breath hitches, and he slows, savoring me. Worshipping. He kisses each breast gently, lingering over and laving my nipples until I tremble beneath him. Until I writhe, until the scent of my arousal draws him lower.
Then he smooths a gentle hand over my belly and pauses. His breath catches. A shadow crosses his face—grief, longing, devastation? I can’t tell which.
But the way he cups my stomach with both hands breaks me open. After I answer Blackbourne’s Call, Raiden will lose most rights to his son. Yes, everyone will know he fathered my youngling. But as my mate, magickind will recognize Blackbourne as the child’s father.
I rise up. “Raiden…I’ll stay. The danger, it’s?—”
“No, you won’t stay. I won’t let you.” His voice, low and solemn, shakes. “Please. Just let me…say good-bye.”
Those words cut me to the core.
He eases me back onto the bed, settles between my thighs, and kisses the silky-wet flesh there with a reverence that steals my breath. I gasp—then cry out as pleasure streaks up my spine. He lingers, savoring me, as if he can’t bear to let go.
“Raiden…” I whimper, lifting my hips, giving him everything. Even after all that’s passed between us, I can’t resist. I can’t stop loving him.
Beneath his caress, I mewl and buck, surrendering every last shiver to him. My climax breaks over me in shattering waves.
Before my cries even fade, he rises, positions himself between my legs, and slides inside me—deep, deep, impossibly deep. I gasp, clutching his shoulders. He feels like home. Like the place I belong.
His jaw clenches, and his eyes close as if sensations overwhelm him, too. Then he cups my face in both hands and refuses to look anywhere but into my eyes. His thrusts are slow, tender, heartbreakingly careful—as if this isn’t sex at all, but something sacred. Something final.
