“You look miserable.Tan, but miserable. Tell me you didn’t stick to your vow of having no fun.”
He should have said no. When he’d turned his phone back on and immediately received a call from Manuel, he should have declined his offer of a ride back from the airport and spent the money on a rideshare. Or a bus. Hell, walking would be preferable to socializing when he’d had barely a moment to process the cyclone of feelings rampaging through him.
“I’m just tired,” he assured his friend, closing his eyes and resting back against the seat for emphasis.
Hannah had not been on the return flight, and thank God, because he couldn’t see a way he’d be capable of answering any Evan-related questions without falling to pieces. Which would have been awkward.
Davrin, however, had been on the flight. Davrin, with his gossip’s smile and light brown eyes.
He’d turned on the charm the moment he’d sat down, and spent the entire flight laying a thick carpet of intimation that he’d be willing to provide a phone number were he asked for it.
Heath of two weeks ago might have asked him. Well, he’d certainly have felt flattered and possibly thought about it without ever asking, because he had absolutely no game. New Heath, however, was merely polite and casually flirty, because his heart wasn’t in it.
He could easily picture Davrin sharing their table at Spin,but not as his partner. Despite being very handsome and friendly and filled with hilarious stories of his travels, Davrin was not who he wanted. Evan was. And it would be a long damn time before he got past the disappointment of that.
“I’m sorry about letting the conversation get out of hand before. I feel bad.”
Heath opened an eye and rolled it in his direction. “Just you?”
Manuel responded with his uncomfortable laugh. “You know how Andres is.”
Yes, he was a cunt. Heath was well aware.
“I haven’t decided if I’m forgiving either of you, but apology appreciated.”
“It’s all out of love, you know that, right? We want to see you happy, and these guys you’ve been with haven’t deserved you.”
Damn Manuel and his sweet, supportive tone. “I also appreciate that, but I’m the one who makes that decision, not you two.”
He sighed, but nodded. “Of course. We know that, but it’s difficult to see you putting yourself into these situations where you end up hurt. We just want to spare you the heartache.”
“I know, but you’re trying to circumvent it entirely, and that’s not how life works. For all you know, my soulmate could appear as the world’s biggest piece of shit, only to be unmasked as a tender romantic with a broken heart of his own that needs mending.”
Manuel’s eyebrows pinched together as he cast a sidelong glance. “That is… very specific.”
“Poetic, Manny. The word you’re looking for is poetic.”
He cleared his throat and focused back on the road. “Right. Sure. Oh! So what ended up happening with that guy and the attendant?”
Heath dug his fingernails into his palms and turned towardthe window so Manuel wouldn’t see his glassy eyes. “Didn’t work out. No chemistry.”
“Seriously? After the way you talked it up, I thought for sure there would be more gossip.”
“Welp, turns out I was wrong.”
Can’t you feel it when you have chemistry with someone?
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yes, I’m just tired, I swear.” So goddamn tired.
Twenty additional minutes passed with Manuel filling him in on work, his husband, and Chloe (“Seriously, Heath. It was only one rock, and she was a baby!”). He then moved on to Andres and his love entourage. Lovetourage? It was all very standard goings-on. Just another couple of weeks in their lives.
“You haven’t talked about your vacation at all.”
“You haven’t let me get a word in.”
Manuel huffed. “You’ve never let my rambling stop you from butting in. Be honest with me, Heath. Did something happen? You seem even less happy than when you left.”
