His eyes are wide and bright. “This is the coolest thing I’ve ever seen.” He holds open the back door, shaking his head at me like I’m something that deserves marvel.
I blush. “Stop. It’s really no big deal. I’m no big deal.” I take a step out into the cold, but then get yanked back. TJ has a hold of my arm, and his gaze bores into mine.
“You’re a big deal to me, and I won’t have you saying otherwise about yourself.” He leans forward, his face mere inches from mine, his eyes flashing with the fire of determination. My knees wobble as my gaze locks with his. “You’ve been filling your head with the words of people who are all too happy to tear you down. I’m about to change the narrative. Be prepared to hear me compliment you. Be prepared to accept my compliments. You’dbetter start believing them. Because you, Lucy Dupree, are a gem. Don’t you dare let anyone, least of all yourself, dull your shine.”
Dang.
“Can I use that speech in a book?” I squeak out, because my mind is short-circuiting as my heart does backflips inside my chest.
“Only if you promise me you’ll try to believe every word of it.”
I firm my lips and nod.
“Good.” He smirks at me. “Come on, now. I hear creativity waits for no one.”
Chapter 28
Lucy
Iblink my eyes open and stare up at the ceiling of my room at Daisy’s Inn.
“It’s Christmas morning,” I say aloud.
I went to church last night here in Cashmere Cove. I sat in the back, and everyone was so caught up with their families that no one paid me much attention. Mass was beautiful, with poinsettias surrounding the sanctuary and candles flickering in every window.
It was a tradition between my dad and me to go to Christmas Eve mass, and then have a slow Christmas morning, culminating with a big lunch and a birthday cake for Jesus for dessert. I allow myself a couple minutes to lie still. My mind conjures up the smiling faces of both my parents. My dad’s favorite picture of him and my mom used to sit on our mantle. After he married Ruby, he gave it to me to keep in my bedroom.
I palm my phone on the nightstand next to me and click on my photos. I took a picture of a picture so I’d always have it with me. The two of them smile back at me from the screen. I zoom in on their youthful faces, their grins as wide as their cheekbones. Behind them is a sprawling tree farm with snow-dotted pines and a bright blue sky. I touch the screen, as if I may be able to actually feel them. Seeing them standing there, with their arms wrapped around each other, I realize the traditions my dad kept going for me were ones he and my mom started. I wonder if it was painful for him, doing what the two of them used to do together, alone. I never really considered it until now, andmaybe it’s because of everything that happened earlier this week with TJ and honoring Tess’s memory, but there’s something really beautiful about moving forward but carrying with you what got you this far.
The People’s Picks are a part of my history now. I’m going to have to come out of the shadows eventually. At the thought, it feels like my mattress has turned into a pile of sticks. It’s not a comfortable idea.
I blow out a breath. One thing at a time. Today, it’s TJ’s game. I promised him I’d be there, and this is the most public outing I’m attending since the award show, so it has to count for something.
“I wish I had the courage you had, Dad.” I give the still shot of my parents’ smiling faces one last look. “I miss you,” I whisper, then click out of the photo.
I swing my legs over the edge of my bed and glance around my room. It’s a disaster. That’s how my living spaces end up when I enter what I call my writing cave. It’s truly cave-like. There are take-out containers and used coffee mugs strewn about. A pile of laundry is thrown over the chair near the window. I’ve got Post-it notes stuck to the wall over my desk. Today, I’ll enjoy Christmas. Tomorrow, I’ll clean up.
My phone buzzes in my hand, and I look at the screen. I’m expecting to chat with my family in California, but it’s not even seven o’clock, so there’s no way they’re awake right now.
TJ
Merry Christmas, Lu. You up?
My heart lunges in my chest.
Lucy
I am! Merry Christmas to you, too.
TJ
I’m outside. Want to letme in? I have a present for you.
I bolt upright.Shoot. Shoot. Shoot.I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror over my dresser. I’m not in shape to entertain right now. My room is a disaster, so we’ll have to stay downstairs. My face is also a disaster, and unfortunately, that has to come with me. I cross to the en suite bathroom while I type out a message.
Lucy
Give me five minutes.
