I take the opportunity to study the beautiful evening. The twinkling lights hanging above and the way they make the ice appear blue and green. The music playing from loudspeakers, soft and festive. The crowds of kids and parents and teenagers and old folks all enjoying this in kind. The magic of the holiday season bringing people together.
I wonder if maybe, someday, Evan and I will bring our kids here. I suppose we could adopt. Or figure out what science has to offer. I’ve not really ever considered it. Maybe Evan doesn’t want kids. I know I want whatever she does. As soon as she does.
Because nothing in my life has ever felt as easy or right as this. That little version of me in my mother’s home movie knew it. Evan is my best friend. You hold onto that person, tightly. And now—she’s so much more.
“Need a hand, darlin’?” My dad asks, pulling up beside me.
“Yes, please.” I loop my arm through his and off we go.
At first we’re quiet, taking in the ambiance and waving to mom and her friends as we make laps. But then my father clears his throat, and I know he’s about to say something he’s rehearsing in his head. He’s not a particularly quiet man, my father, but his cleared throat only means one of two things. You’re in trouble, or he’s trying to say something right.
I don’t see why I’d be in trouble.
“Teens… I gotta say… I’m so proud of the woman you’ve turned out to be.” His lips rub together as he avoids eye contact with me, making his moustache shuffle side to side. “You’ve done very well for yourself.”
“Thank you, dad.”
“And we love Evan, dearly, too. Even her quirks.”
I wince but smile all the same. “Well, her quirks are no different than mine. The more the merrier.” We stop in front of mom, who’s ditched her friends and stands on the opposite side of the barrier.
“Two quirks in a pod.” He elbows my side, smiling affectionately.
“The term isqueer,Daryl.” My mother rolls her eyes.
I can’t deal with these two.“Go skate together please.” I shoo them away, laughing. “Go. Off with you.”
I spot Evan through the crowd. She waves goodbye to our ex-teacher and starts walking back to the bench where she left her skates. Just then, a voice comes over the loudspeaker.
“Merry Christmas everyone… hope you’re still enjoying tonight’s free skate under the stars brought to you by Mavis' sporting goods. We are just approaching the end of the evening and would like to welcome all the couples on the rink for one last skate. Here to perform, ‘What are you doing New Year’s Eve’is…”
I stop listening as I watch Evan hesitate to do up her skates. I understand it’s one thing to skate in front of all these people, in this small town, as a friend helping another friend balance. But it’s a whole other thing to announce our couple status.
Focusing carefully on each step, I attempt to walk to the rink’s exit without falling flat on my ass just as the song begins.
My skate slides out sideways, and I cling on to the side for dear life as I begin to shuffle in even smaller movements, determined to make it out in one piece. Who thought putting razor blades on shoes was a good idea? Fully concentrating on the ice in front of me and nothing else, I make it to the exit and sigh a breath of relief.
That is until I look up and see Evan smirking at me. Skates on, stepping out onto the ice.
“Come on, baby.” She takes my arm and places it through hers.
Speechlessly, I place one foot in front of the other. Clutching to her for dear life.
“Evan, people can see us.”
“Yeah.”
“They saidcouples skate.”
She stops dead.Oh, she didn’t hear.“You’re right… we haven’t actually clarified that. Have we?”
“What?” I laugh, a stuttery manic thing.
“Well, we sort of transitioned from fake girlfriends to so much more without really discussing it.”
“Oh.” I narrow my eyes on her. “I guess?”
She pulls me to her front, arms around my waist. I look around the crowd—dreading to see a familiar, disapproving face. But Evan’s eyes are locked on me, so I give her my full attention. “Clara Spencer, Teens, love of my life… will you be myrealgirlfriend?”
