“That’s a million dollars, divided by fifty-two weeks in a year, divided by a forty-hour workweek.” They close their eyes, using their amazing finance brain to quickly inform me: “That’s about $480 an hour.”
This time, both Clara and I choke on a sip.
“So go back and ask him for five hundred dollars an hour,” Jordan says, and in the few seconds of silence that follow, I find I’m unable to immediately argue with this suggestion.
The three of us stare ahead at the jewel-toned bottles of spirits, cordials, and liqueurs lining the mirrored shelves of our neighborhood bar. I don’t know what Jordan and Clara are mulling over in the quiet, but for me it’s the rent bill I got today in an otherwise empty mailbox, with no sighting of Friday to ease the sting of the continued absence of my severance check. I’m mulling over how getting asked back for second and third interviews is great, but these companies taking their sweet time in the hiring process isnotgreat. I’m mulling over my dead and empty fridge, and the fact that it’s a hassle to walk an hour to use the public computers at the library, and the daily sight of the corpse of my beloved office chair still lying prone in my bedroom.
What does it hurt to ask?I think.If Jude wants this so bad, let him say no. Hell, for five hundred dollars an hour, I might even go back to PitchSlapped if they ever came begging.
But damn, let’s try this first.
January 21, 2026
Codeify Slack channel
Jude T: I heard back from Veronica.
Adam P: And?
She asked for a hefty consulting package. $500/hour plus a laptop and a new desk chair
A desk chair? Why is that so funny to me
Did you miss the part about $500/hr?
No, but let me do the math
I’m going to counter; I’m just not sure with what.
Dude, I just did the calculation, andYoumake $230/hr
... I am not going to calculate my hourly rate
I think she’s just trying to get me to go away.
But she’s still replying. You’re not creepy yet.
lol thanks
I think I’ll go back to her and offer a monthly retainer of $5,000
If she can get this pitch in shape in ten hours, then she’s earned her preferred rate
If not, fine, but either way we’ll get help
Email correspondence between Veronica Cochran and Jude Tilde
Subject: Re: Consulting rate
Date: January 21, 2026
Jude,
My counter to your counter: $10K monthly retainer, laptop, desk chair.
-Veronica
Veronica,
