In a loud voice, Genesis said, “Enjoy the appetizers and music. Keep your eyes out for whales. The ceremony will start when we get out to sea.”
Almost time to get fake married, theG-Spot
Gabby clung to the railing and watched the land fade into nothingness. They were going farther and farther into the ocean on a boat about to be repossessed by North Korea with people who had no scruples at the helm. Genesis, it seemed, would do anything for money. Amanda had, unfortunately, been right in her article: Inner-G had done everything but murder.
At the moment, there was nothing to do but float out to sea in a really over-the-top, couture wedding dress, hoping for the best. Except for the couture part, it wasn’t an inaccurate description of her first marriage. She hadn’t planned for anything after the dress with Phil.
Justin put his arm around her. “This is the most beautiful wedding I’ve ever been to.”
Gabby choked on a laugh.Oh, Justin.
About thirty minutes out, the boat came to a stop, and Gabby’s heart dropped to her stomach. This was it. The fake wedding to the former man of her dreams.
“Before you say your vows,” Genesis announced, “the men have a surprise for the ladies.”
Gabby’s breath hitched at the word “surprise.” No thanks to any more of those.
“Gia, this is for you, but it’s also for Jasmine, for Lana, for Hugh. George and I have been working on this all week,” he said. “Gia, this goes out to you.”
Markus caught her eye from across the boat and confirmed with a curt head nod. This was indeed for her. She braced herself for what must be the comedy section of the night he had warned her about.
“Jasmine wouldn’t let me have a live band,” G added.
Gabby scanned the deck. Before she could think about it too much, the music came on. A cheesy nineties synthesizer filled the night air. The opening chords of “I’ll Make Love to You” by Boyz II Men came on and struck a chord in Gabby’s heart. Markus, Genesis, Geeves, and Hugh started walking calmly to the front of the boat. They were wearing hats and walking in step.
Boyz II Men started singing, “I’ll make love to you, like you want me to.” All of them lip-synced while making uncomfortably direct eye contact. Gabby didn’t know if she should laugh or… what should she do?
“Relax, let’s go slow,” they lip-synced. Genesis was slipping his robe off.
Markus looked at her. So much information passed between them in that one glance. The first layer of information was practical. Markus wasn’t doing any illicit spy work with Genesis. The man was rehearsing for a groomsman’s dance. Of all the dumb things. Gabby started laughing and couldn’t stop. He hadn’t been double-crossing her; he’d been working on choreo.
Markus looked good. He was selling this groomsman’s dance like it was his job, because it was.
After the first few verses, the track changed to “Pony” by Ginuwine, and they broke out theirMagic Mikemoves. Markus dropped to the ground and did one of those athletic humping-the-floor numbers, the kind that made everyone wish they were the ground.
He was just showing off now. Gabby didn’t even have words for the moves he was doing. She’d been doing yoga and cleansing while he was in the woods rehearsing dances like he was a thirteen-year-old girl at a sleepover. Life was a joke. This week, the joke was on her.
Her eyeballs were wider open than they’d ever been. Her jaw was on the floor. Markus was… Dear lord. She fanned her face.
Justin whispered in her ear, “G flew out a choreographer, that guy who never took his Beats headphones off. Did you get a load of his abs?”
Her emotions were all over, crying because they’d worked so hard on this dance for her, scared that she and Markus were about to lose their jobs and maybe spark off an international incident. Then anger flashed hot—but why didn’t Markus tell her what he was doing? They were on a mission. He should have said, “Yo, Gabs, just so you know…”
Did Markus want this to be an actual surprise?
The men did some sort of move where they were in a line so that you could see all their arms but only one body. Hugh was in front doing his thing. He looked a little too stiff and had some of the movements only partly down, but Justin was dissolving into tears and clutching his chest like his heart was about to burst. Gabby had never even seen Hugh walk quickly before, and here he was swinging his hips and hitting marks in the most epic groomsman’s dance ever.
For the finale, Big G hefted Lil’ G onto a perch on his shoulders like Markus was one of those tiny cheerleaders. There was no flipping or throwing, but lifting him was impressive enough. And then G turned in a circle while holding Markus up as high as he could. Hugh and the others did some sort of jazz hands move while Geeves twerked. Gabby didn’t understand it, but she truly loved it. Cones of sparklers went off at the front of the boat. It was… a triumph. It was ridiculous and over-the-top. And it absolutely sent her over the edge.
Now Gabby was crying happy tears instead of angry, sad, mad ones. The emotional roller coaster was real. That’s why adults don’t need to get their adrenaline rush at Space Mountain. Gabby dabbed at her eyes. She was overcome.
Next to her, Phil looked like they had invented a new level of sour candy and were forcing him to suck on it at gunpoint.
Gabby didn’t care about anyone but the man who had just tangoed to “Señorita” with a three-hundred-pound cult leader. He was for her.
As the smoke cleared, Big G called out, “Gia, I think George’s ready to share some of these moves with you.”
This was going to make arresting Genesis later so much more awkward.
