“I know it sounds crazy, but I couldn’t deal with the stress. It was too much: too much pressure, too much work, no life outside of class, rehearsal, and touring, and I just wasn’t made for it. And believe it or not, being gay in that world isn’t so easy, especially not in Moscow. Let alone for a foreigner like me. And by then, I’d met Dante. I was in love with him, he was the world to me. He still is,” he said, looking serious and shaking his head.
“So you left it all for love.”
“That was a big part of it, yeah. He was here, I was there. We barely ever saw each other, and the job didn’t make up for it. Besides, I was tired. Very tired.”
“And you came back,” I said.
“I came back and I helped Dante set up the restaurant. And he helped me with my diving company…”
“Your diving company?” I asked, surprised.
“Yeah, you didn’t know about it? It’s small, just a couple of boats and four instructors, but we’re growing. The undersea world has always enchanted me.”
“What about the school?”
“When I came back, Nicoletta was already sick. That school was her life, and losing it would have killed her. I helped her keep it afloat—I owed that to her. When she died, she willed it to me. I haven’t been able to let it go. I doubt I ever will. I still love ballet. That’s the truth.”
“It was nice dancing with you,” I told him.
“Likewise.” He smiled. “Speaking of, how long are you going to stay here?”
That question put me on edge. “I’m not sure. Why do you ask?”
“Well…I don’t like to close the school in the summer, because it’s almost like a day care. Since this town survives off of tourism, many of the parents are working in hospitality and can’t get time off, and they don’t know what to do with their kids. I don’t mind, but staffing’s always an issue, and…I wonder if you’d like to give classes there. I’ve got some kids who are really talented and have lots of potential, and I think it would help them, learning from you.”
“I’ve already got a job at the florist,” I reminded him.
“Yeah, in the morning,” he said. “I’d only need you at the school for a few hours, three afternoons a week. And I’d pay you, obviously.”
“I’ve never taught. I studied dance, not dance education.”
“You’ve got experience, and you know what it is to learn. That’s more than enough.”
“I don’t know what to say,” I admitted.
“Then say yes,” he told me.
We both laughed, and I agreed we could try.
“Good, let’s try then. This is incredible, isn’t it?”
“What?” I asked.
“This! You and me! How similar we are, and how we just happened to meet each other. And now we’re here sharing things most people could never understand. It’s one hell of a coincidence.”
I smiled and nodded, but now I was starting to feel bad. It wasn’t a coincidence, and not telling him was making me miserable. My silence, at this point, was no better than a lie.
“Giulio…”
“Yes?”
I had the words, but once again, fear turned them into empty air. Weeks before, when I arrived there, I’d had nothing to lose. Now I felt I could lose everything, even if none of it really belonged to me.
“Nothing,” I told him, and we looked up as the sun vanished over the horizon.
“They say the past is made of memories and the future is born of dreams,” he whispered. “What’s happened can’t be changed, and regretting it is a waste of time. Who knows what’s to come. No one, I can promise you that.”
I turned my head aside and looked at him in profile, asking, “What about the present?”
