‘For Love?’
He reached across me, putting his hand on my chest, and grabbed my soda. ‘You’re cut off. Get out of my house.’
‘No! You talked up this movie so much, I have to see it now.’ He pulled the soda to his chest, looking at me like he wasn’t sure he trusted me. ‘Please.’
He sighed. ‘You gonna talk through the whole thing?’
‘I’ll be as quiet as Arnold.’ I pointed across the room, where Arnold had already lain down by the door. Meanwhile, Gertie was pacing around, waiting for us to figure out what we were going to do.
He gave me back my soda and said, ‘Fine.’ He took out his phone, and with a few taps the lights began to dim.
‘Oh!’ I said, looking around the room. ‘Youarein the moo—’
‘I swear to God, Thomas.’ His voice was stern, but his face betrayed him, the dimples in his cheeks peeking at me, making my chest tighten.
‘Right. Quiet as Arnold.’
He pressed play, and Gertie – unable to read the room – jumped up on the couch, separating us.
‘Gertie!’ Gabe yelled. She flung her tongue at him, then plopped down with a grunt, splaying across both of our feet.
I reached down and scratched behind her ears, smiling across her. Gabe rolled his eyes and the movie started.
WatchingIn the Mood for Lovewith Gabe was different from watchingBack to the Future. I didn’t make jokes or ask questions. Mainly because I was too busy reading the subtitles, but also because it felt so much more personal. It felt like this was Gabe unlocking his phone without clearing his browser history and letting me do a deep dive for as long as I wanted.
It wasn’t a fun time-travel adventure; it was an artistic display of love and relationships. If you, like me, had no idea this movie existed, here are the spoilers: it’s about these sexy Chinese folks in Hong Kong in the sixties. The main guy and the main girl – both married to other people – become secret friends because in the sixties mixed-sex friendships in China were a faux pas.Thenthey find out each of their spouses is having an affairwith the other’s spouse. So they meet up in a hotel to do the deed, to show their spouses four can play at that game, or whatever.
But they can’t do it – they don’t want to stoop to their level. But the guy is in love with the girl and has to move, but he wants her to leave with him. Of course she just misses catching him before he’s gone for good and it’s too late. Years pass and they have these near-misses where they almost get to find each other again, but they never do.
And at the end of the movie the guy is telling his friend about a tradition where you’re supposed to whisper a secret into a hole in a tree and cover it with mud. So we see the dude doing that, only into a hole in a temple wall in Cambodia.
I was glad the lights were dimmed, because the end credits started to blur. I pretended to sip at my empty can of soda and surreptitiously wiped at my eye.
‘Want to watch something else?’ Gabe asked.
I did. I wanted to stay and watch anything with him, but something more exciting maybe, and less emotionally devastating. I looked at my phone; it was almost eleven thirty. I had already texted my mom to let her know I was watching a movie at a friend’s house. She didn’t press me about who the friend was or remind me of my curfew, but I knew if I wasn’t home by midnight I’d be in trouble. My mom rarely grounded me, but she had a way of scolding that made me feel awful.
‘I want to, but I have to get home.’
He reached over Gertie’s snoring mass and took my empty soda can. ‘Come on, I’ll walk you out.’
I petted Gertie, but she kept snoring on the couch. Arnold was splayed out as well, and stayed put, watching Gabe leave.
We walked down the wooden staircase mounted on the side of the carriage house back to my car.
‘Thanks for coming over,’ Gabe said. ‘And indulging me. I don’t show many people that movie.’
I could tell. Just watching it in silence with him felt like … well, it felt like I was the wall at the end of the movie. Like he was whispering his secrets into me and I’d hold them forever.
‘It was really good. Sad, but …’
He nodded. ‘I know. One of the reasons I don’t show it to people, but you did ask for it.’
‘I did.’
‘So …’ He dragged out the word and avoided my gaze. ‘Now that I showed you that. And we’ve been friendly for the past few weeks …’
My mouth went dry. Which was not good if this was going the way I thought it was. Was this our moment? Was I actuallynotreading all this wrong, and was Gabe about to ask if he could kiss me, and was the object of all my adolescent desires finally going to—
