“No.”
“What if?—”
“You have enough weapons already. The last thing you need is a new one monthly.”
I grimace a little.
“Do you already get one a month?”
“Yes… definitely…one… a month.”
“Leland, do you get more than one weapon a month?”
“We could sell the Mistress and turn your side of the garage into another gun shrine.”
Jackson’s eyes go wide. “Why punish me and take away my baby?”
“Because I’m jealous.”
“Don’t be jealous.”
“I feel like you stroke her more than me.”
“Never.”
“Sometimes you choke her a little when someone cuts you off, and you never choke me.”
“Do you… do youwantto be choked? Like where is this going? Honestly, no one knows. I bet you sure don’t.”
“Oh, hell no, Jackson. I know where nothing goes. Only thing I know where it goes is your dick. Oh, and that we’re going out to eat and you better love it. If you don’t, you’re going to say, ‘WOW, Leland, I LOVED this place.’”
“Even if I hated it?” Jackson asks as I notice him turning up the fan on his side of the car. I can’t help but wonder if his toasty tush from the heated seat I turned on is causing it.
“Even then.”
“What if the food is atrocious?” he asks.
“You spread your love all over it.”
“I’m uncomfortable again.”
“Good. Sophia recommended this place.”
“The woman wholiedto you and tried trading you off to bad guys… you took her recommendation?”
“That’s the best kind of people to get them from. The kind where you take your life in your hands every time you try their recommendation.”
“I just… oddly… feel like they’re not. Hon, do you think maybe you need some better friends?”
“Can they get much better? I mean, clearly Tavish can, but the rest are pretty solid threes all around.”
“If you think your friends are threes, I’d hate to see what you think Tavish is.”
“Negative seven on a scale of one to five, obviously.”
“I mean, could anything get more obvious than that?” Jackson asks.
“Probably not.”
