“Yes.”
“You cheated.”
“You never said we couldn’t use our power. And I was controlling both, so how was it cheating?” I ask.
His playful expression has me hooked, but I can’t let it. “I’m pretty sure you came first. How about first to three?”
“Why would you want to embarrass yourself like that? I’ll make you come first every time.”
“I’d like to watch you try,” Asmodeus murmurs as he leans in for a kiss, but the sliver of intelligence still left in my mind hits me, so I jerk back and quickly tuck myself back in.
“No,” I say. “We’re done. We’ll call it a tie. Good night.”
“Good night? It’s not even dinner yet.”
“I have work to finish and I need a shower. I’ll eat in my room.”
“Mind if I stare at you while you do so?” he asks.
“For which part?”
“For all three.”
My phone starts ringing, and I look over at it and see that it’s Valerie. “I really do have many things to do.”
“Fine, fine. We’ll worry about that best of three later.”
“It doesn’t matter how many numbers you tack on there, you’d never win.”
“We’ll see,” he says as he lets me go. I’m almost surprised he does. Does he realize that I’m a weak fucking man who craves touch and attention and everything he’s willing to give me? But I can’t let him. I can’t. I can’t.
Because I have to protect him.
I hurry into my bathroom and peel off my wet underwear from where the fabric sticks to the lube. I shed all of it and just throw it all onto the floor before hesitating in front of the mirror and glancing down at the tattoos that run across my chest… and the new scar that cuts right through them. My finger runs down that scar as I think about the man who’d put it there. The desperation to make a change… to make a difference for the family he lost.
And instead, I cower and hide, unable to face my past.
How can Asmodeus go through everything he’s gone through and still have the courage to face what he’s done? He’s the strongest person I’ve ever met, and I envy that courage.
I slip into the shower, deciding I’ll call Valerie back after, but even then, I can’t find it in myself to do so. While I’m working, Asmodeus brings me food he must have prepared. He eats in the room with me, sitting improperly in a chair with his feet on my wall, headphones in place, laughing over something he’s watching.
I want to ask him how he can laugh like that, but wouldn’t that sound like I’m judging him for being happy? I’m the miserable fuck over here.
“Anything I can help with?” he asks.
“No. It’s just things I’ve let fall behind.”
“Youlet something fall behind?”
“You and your friends are horrible influences,” I grumble.
“Are we? Because you seem happier now than you were when we met you. That has to count for something.”
I contemplate that and discover that he’s right. I am a miserable fuck… but I’m not as miserable as I used to be.
“Stop saying things that make no sense.”
He cackles before deciding the chair isn’t good enough and flopping down on my bed, hugging my pillow to himself. “You just don’t want to hear the truth.”
