“Stay in the car.”
“Would it feel better to beat someone up? I offer myself as tribute.”
“In what world would that make me feel better?”
He grins at me before smacking one of my illusions. “I wanna fuck this one up.”
I gape at him, much as my illusion is doing. “You… you…”
“Yeah? I think your illusion liked that,” Asmodeus says with a smirk while he smacks him again.
I send my attention to that illusion with the intention of smacking him back, but the man is so fast I fail spectacularly as he goes and smacks another one.
“This one likes it even more,” Asmodeus says, grabbing the illusion and twirling him around.
I send five at him at once, feeling like it would benefit me greatly if I really could smack him around a little. The issue is that he’s already off trying to drag another illusion into some strange rendition of a waltz.
“You are going to pay for driving me mad,” I hiss as I split my attention between four of them only to have him grab one that I’m controlling and pull the illusion into his arms. It feels strangely intimate when he knocks the legs out from under the illusion I’m in and drops me into a dip, beaming down at me.
I quickly pull out of that illusion, letting him have at it, but he seems to know whichever one I’m focused on and pinpoints them so he can pester me.
And as he goes for the next one, I use my own body to slide up behind him and smack the side of his head gently.
“You’re not funny,” I say, pleased that I finally smacked him back.
I wave the illusions away, but my consciousness that’s still split between them seems far too interested in Asmodeus, and ittakes a bit of focus to stop wanting to do more and send them away.
“I’m hilarious, thank you. Are you jealous? Would you like to dance with me?”
“Absolutely not.”
He smiles before dropping to his ass and lying sprawled on the ground. “Come on, lie down with me.”
“Why would I lie in that filth?”
“Because it’s fun,” he says as he knocks my legs gently before swooping in and grabbing me. No part of being dragged to the ground is enjoyable, but he grins like a banshee once I’m down next to him.
“This is pissing me off,” I declare.
“Honestly, I’m not the best one to ask for advice when it comes to horrible parents. I really don’t think you’ll like my advice to just kill them off.”
“Weirdly enough, you’re right for the first time in your life.”
That makes him laugh while I stare at the beautiful sky above me. The sun is shining between the leaves, and it’s almost enough, for just a moment, to make me feel like things aren’t that bad.
“I can feel the wetness seeping through my suit.”
“Yeah, my ass is quite moist,” Asmodeus says.
“Do you think I want to show up anywhere with a moist ass?”
“I don’t know why you wouldn’t.”
“You follow me when I ask you not to, pester me, and piss off my mother.”
“You’re welcome,” he responds, closing his eyes. His ferret, who’s been wandering until now, comes over and lies on his chest while staring at me. It’s clear she wants to bite me.
“Your ferret is so prickly.”
