I hear the toilet flush before a man waltzes out as he wipes his hands off on his pants. “Hey, buddy!” he says, waving wildly like I might not notice his lumbering figure.
“Ah, Landon’s strangest brother. Good day. Have you seen a man around here?”
Brandon appears elated. “I have! Right in front of me. Haha. I’m so funny.”
“Hilarious. Another man.”
“Oh… I don’t know. How recent? I really don’t think so. What are you all doing here?”
“Do you even realize that the building is under lockdown with everyone inside taken as hostages?” Ellison asks.
Brandon looks shocked. “No way! That’s so cool!”
“It’s not‘cool.’”
“I don’t know! I took a hostage once, but he was so much fun we became friends. He asked me for like a thousand bucks since he felt so close to me. Told me he’d pay me back because he’s a real good guy… he’s been so busy he hasn’t returned any of my texts, though…”
“This is a waste of time,” Ellison says. “If you see anyone, let us know.”
“Nope. Haven’t seen anyone. I guess you could ask the guy I helped through the window in the bathroom. He couldn’t reach the tiny window up top. But he came from this way, so maybe he saw someone.”
Ellison and I both stare at Brandon for far too long. A part of me is going, “The longer you stare, the farther away the man gets,” but another part of me is like, “I have misheard something.”
I rush into the bathroom and sure enough, the window has been busted out. “Brandon, help me through.”
“Are you going to fit through that tiny window?” Ellison asks.
“Are you saying my ass is too voluptuous?”
“Shove him through with full force,” Ellison demands, so Brandon picks me up and practically yeets me at the window like I’m a fucking football. The only thing that keeps me from busting my head on the windowsill is my fast reflexes. I use my sleeves to keep from cutting myself on the broken glass as I stuff myselfthrough a second before I look up and see Valerie towering over me, since the window lets out at ground level.
“Someone alerted me that there was a person escaping through the window and it’s just you.”
“The man in question already escaped through the window, so use your siren abilities and find him,” I say.
“Mywhat?” she shrieks as she puts a foot on my face. It allows me to see under her skirt, which is the absolute last thing I would ever want. It’s even worse than the shoe on my face and should only be used as a last resort torture technique.
“Use your siren screech to find him and stop using it on me.”
She grinds her foot into my face a bit more while I wallow and claw my way free. Finally, I’m up and scanning the area, much to Valerie’s distaste, but the man has disappeared into the crowd.
“Tell the others I’ll be back,” I say, and off I run about two feet before Ellison’s illusion hooks me around the throat.
“You are not going alone.”
“Your ability to frustrate me is quite exquisite… and a little sexy,” I inform him.
“Funny,” he says, disappearing a moment before the others join me.
“Any luck?” Landon asks.
“Your brother helped him through the window so he could escape,” I explain. “And then the siren screeched loud enough that it delayed me.”
“Valerie tends to do that,” Landon says, understanding who I meant immediately. “The police came in and took over guarding the villains, though Lex stayed on hand to help. The hostages should be free to go… I’m a bit confused, though. So the guy who killed one of the villains was the one who attacked Ellison, right? So… if he’s a bad guy… why did he kill another bad guy?”
“Fuck if I know, but what I do know is I’m going to murder first and ask questions later.”
“That sounds like a horrible idea.”
