“Ellison the Fool? There’s no way, but please… tell me how I accomplished it.”
“Because your ass crack is on display and I accidentally announced it to the nurse instead of you.”
Asmodeus is laughing so hard he nearly falls out of the tree. “I wasn’t aware you were enjoying my ass crack so much you wanted to share it with strangers. Would you like me to fix it?”
“Yes, please.”
He pulls his pants down a bit more so there’s even more on display while he continues his climb down from the tree.
“I hope you get a splinter in your ass.”
“Is that what you’re calling it these days? And are you offering to put it there?”
A growl escapes me as I consider what it’d be like to kick him in that ass he’s showing off. “Can you come to the hospital now? What have you found out here? All you’ve done is put yourself at risk for absolutely no reason at all.”
He beams at me. “There’s definitely a reason. And the reason is to figure out who attacked you.”
“What if they’re waiting right outside my hospital room as we speak? What if they’re strangling me while we talk?”
“Landon and August would never let that happen.”
“Landon’s reading a good book. He hasn’t even noticed that someone’s entered the room.”
Asmodeus hesitates, well aware that what I’ve just said really isn’t that farfetched. “You are sadly right…”
“Of course I’m right. I’m always right. I’m?—”
Suddenly, pain tears through my head and I begin to fall. Five illusions burst out and I find my mind tumbling full force into another as I grab my head and drop to my knees. “Fuck.” I wave the illusions away, unsure what just happened to push me to another illusion.
Asmodeus spins quickly and rushes to me. “What’s wrong?”
“I think the drugs are making my head hazy. I have to stop, so please come back. I don’t like you out here with no one to watch you.”
I pull the illusion back to myself as I realize I’m grabbing my head in the hospital room and August is standing over me.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, I’m good,” Landon says from where he’s buried in a book.
August pauses before going, “I’m talking to the patient, hon.”
“Huh? What? Did something happen?” he asks.
I’ve discovered that jerking my arms up to grab my head hurts my wounded chest, and I grit my teeth. “I’m fine. I think I pushed myself a bit too much when I’m still fuzzy.”
“Okay. Maybe don’t use your illusions right now and just call Deus with a phone like a normal person?” Landon suggests.
“He doesn’t answer.”
“I guess. I’m going to send him middle-finger emojis until he arrives… ooh la la. Now he’s sending me eggplant emojis. August… I think Deus is trying to show me his penis.”
“Tell him that if he gets his ass out of those woods where it’s not safe, you will glance at it. That’s all you’re allowed. A glance… a peek,” August says… for some reason.
“I don’t wanna.”
“If it gets your friend back here safely?—”
“Fine. Just a peek. I’ll take a picture so you can see it too so it’s less awkward. We’ll be penis peeker partners.”
