The one I had my heart set on.
“What about work?” she asked.
“I included it at first. It complicated things, and ultimately, it came down to the same answer.” I looked at her, ensuring she knew how serious I was when I said, “Whatever the outcome is, it won’t affect your chance of being offered a permanent position.”
“And yours?”
“Don’t worry about it.”
I wasn’t worried. Because through the mapping process, I’d not only worked through my feelings for Elizabeth but also inadvertently solidified my feelings about Simucon and about being promoted. But now wasn’t the time for that distraction.
“Would we keep it a secret?” she asked.
My heart flip-flopped at the insinuation that she wanted this as much as I did. I nodded. “For now. For the next two days.”
Her deft fingers traced another portion of my mind map. “What’s going on here?”
“I tried matching our traits”—I turned away while she deciphered the scribbles calling her beautiful, smart, kind, thoughtful, funny (the list went on)—“and when that didn’t feel comprehensive enough, I assigned weights to the things about my personality I thought may win you over based on what the internet tells me are desirable traits for a man to have.”
I paused here in the hope that she’d giggle and not make me want to bury myself in the various holes I’d been digging on-site.
But her eyes stayed fixed on the map.
A chill ran through me. I overdid it. I showed too much of my true intensity.
“This is a weird thing to tell you. Never mind. I was trying to, like… explain that I think you’re amazing, and I can’t believe you’d ever think of yourself otherwise but… um… I’m sorry.”
I moved closer to take the sheet away from her, but instead, sheleaped into my arms, nearly toppling me over. The paper crinkled between our chests.
“Tell me more. What was the result? Did you do a sensitivity analysis?” She wrapped her legs around my waist, and it short-circuited my thoughts.
With no other option available to my love-flooded brain, I kissed her. My legs shook with anticipation, and I sat down, pulling her onto my lap. Heat spread from her body onto my thighs. My mouth skimmed across the freckles on her exposed shoulder.
Elizabeth sighed, letting her head roll back and giving me full access to her neck.
My laptop screen lit up, capturing our attention. Her eyes jumped across the spreadsheet, and she grabbed the mouse and scrolled. My stomach was a mess; even the butterflies were in knots.
“Lincoln,” she whispered.
“I know, I’munusualandweirdand those are understatements, and yes, I’ve rated those traits negatively.” My left hand curled around her waist and rested on her soft stomach.
Her free hand found it and entwined our fingers.
“You didn’t finish it,” she said when she got to the bottom.
“I didn’t need to because, even if my preferred scenario, number four, was ranked on the lower end, I was going to change it. Become the man you need me to be or just drop down on my knees and beg you to give me a chance and prove to you how perfect we’d be together. I know I freaked out at first, but that’s because… you liked Link. I’m not Link. You also liked Mr. Carden, and I don’t know if I’m him either. I… I mask so often, I don’t know who I am, and I… panicked because you’re you. You’re Lily.” I took a breath. My chest was awfully tight, and I did not have an inhaler nearby. “You’re everything I want.”
She turned around, straddling me on the chair, and I’d never been happier to be locked in somewhere.
“You’re Lincoln.” As she pinned me with her intense gray eyes, my adrenaline rushed. “You’re Link, you’re Mr. Carden, Dr. Carden, you’re your mom’s handyman and the person your friends will drive forever to see. You’re a coffee drinker, a sandwich buyer, an ADHD-riddled genius who loves Blade Olive, and yes, you’re anxious and closed off, but you’re you. We don’t need this spreadsheet. I’m already, and will always be, in love with every version of you.”
My heart sprang into my throat, and before I could reply, her mouth was against mine. Softer than before. She mumbled against my lips, “And I’m so sorry for not speaking up sooner. I started suspecting it weeks ago but I wasn’t sure.” A soft kiss. Another. Another. More words came out of her mouth, directly onto mine. “All I knew was that you were both engineers, mommy’s boys, and like… your name, I guess. But I genuinely thought it was only because ofZelda.”
My chest opened. That was the best answer to one of the plaguing questions I’d had. I cupped her red cheeks.
“And I kept thinking about how I could be wrong and how awkward it would be if I was, because you’re my boss, but there was this giant panic, like, what if you’re Link. My Link? Statistically, that’s unlikely, isn’t it?”
“Your Link,” I repeated, stuck there.Hers.I kissed her again. I couldn’t do it enough. “And you’re my Lily.” A breath whooshed out of both of us. “Whoa.”
