“I can’t stick around here forever,” my mother said. “There’s too much to do at home.”
So much. I had memories of Momma rubbing VapoRub on my feet for a cough, holding my hair when I puked. But I didn’t know anything about nursing. How was I supposed to take care of her at home?
Some of my panic must have shown in my face, because my mother said, “Don’t fuss. I’ll be fine on my own.”
Keisha adjusted her tray table. “As long as you don’t—”
“Bend, twist, or lift anything heavier than a gallon of milk,” my mother finished for her. They smiled at each other with obvious affection before Mom turned her attention back to me. “Anyway, I’ve got it all figured out. Beth can come home on the weekends, and Meg and Hannah are close by if I need them.”
“But the farm...” I objected. She couldn’t afford to hire help for the farm, Meg said.
“Your father knows a veteran who’s willing to help out for food and a place to stay. So you don’t need to worry about me.”
“When did you talk to Dad?”
“I called him after I spoke with the case manager. He’s decided to stay another night in D.C.”
And hadn’t bothered to notify any of us.
“That’s enough about me.” My mother settled back against her pillow. “What are you doing here?”
I could hardly tell her in front of the aide. “I brought you lunch,” I said, gesturing to the knotted shopping bag. “Black-eyed peas and corn bread.”
My mother smiled. “For luck in the New Year.”
“I can put that in the fridge for you, if you want,” Keisha said.
“That would be wonderful,” my mother said.
I waited until Keisha left the room before I said, “Momma. I was thinking I should move back home for a while.”
“Not on my account. You should go back to New York. Get on with your own life.” She studied me. “Unless... Is there a reason you want to stay?”
I opened my mouth, but my voice had dried up.
My mother sighed. “You never wanted my advice. You’d ask your father sometimes about school stuff. But not me. Even when you got your period, you took care of it yourself.” She smiled a little wistfully. “I didn’t hear about it until Meg complained you’d used up all her supplies.”
“I was embarrassed,” I muttered. But that wasn’t the whole truth. Before puberty hit, I was happy with my body and my life. I didn’t want to change.
“You didn’t want to grow up,” my mother said. “I worried maybe I’d failed you somehow, that you wouldn’t come to me. I thought maybe when you got older... Anyway, I’m here now. If you want to talk.”
“I’m pregnant,” I announced baldly.
She took my hand. “How far along?” Pragmatic as always.
“Five weeks, I think. I didn’t plan it.”Obviously.
“Well.” She patted my hand. “Life is what happens while we’re making other plans.”
“What should I do?”
Her gaze sharpened. “Do you want my opinion? Or my sympathy?”
“I want...” All my feelings rushed in. Burst out. “I want my mommy.”
My mother’s expression melted. Transformed. “Oh, Jo.” She tightened her grip, and I tumbled from my chair, doing my best to hug her despite the brace and the hospital bed. Even with all the hard edges in the way, it was a good hug. When I finally drew back, my eyes were wet. So were hers.
“My little girl.” She kissed my forehead. Wiped my tears with her thumbs. “You’ll figure it out.”
