‘And?’
‘And where is it?’
‘I used it to take care of something.’
‘What “something”?’
‘Something that doesn’t concern you. I thought we had an agreement? You live your life and I’ll live mine. No questions asked.’
‘What have you done, Patrick?’
He lowered the newspaper and sighed. ‘It was an … indiscretion. I needed the money to resolve a misunderstanding.’
Sofia’s pulse hammered in her throat. ‘You’ve been caught, haven’t you? You’ve had to pay someone off.’
‘Like I said, you live your life and—’
‘This is my life you’re screwing with too!’ she screamed. ‘Who was it? What did you do?’
‘Some girl’s mother got the wrong end of the stick and I used the money to ensure no one else got the wrong end of the stick too.’
‘So you, what, paid her off? What kind of a parent would allow you to get away with that?’
‘Are you really lambasting her for turning a blind eye? Pot, kettle, my darling.’
‘What if she comes back demanding more money? Or threatens to go to the tabloids or the police?’
‘She won’t, she signed a non-disclosure agreement. Virtually bit my hand off for the cash.’
‘Where did you get a non-disclosure from?’
‘A lawyer friend of mine drafted it. Fairly standard.’
‘Oh my God,’ said Sofia, feeling faint. ‘How many times have you done this?’
Patrick peered over the top of his glasses. ‘Do you really want to know?’
Sofia did and she didn’t. ‘This has to stop. You have to turn yourself in to the police, it’s the only way forward.’
‘No. I will not do that. I’d be eaten alive in prison.’
‘Then check yourself into a hospital and get the treatment you need.’
‘There is no treatment for people like me! Surely you must know that? My …urges… they’re hardwired into my brain. Coping mechanisms do not work.’
‘What then? You’re just going to spend the rest of your life molesting children and paying off their parents?’
Patrick shook his head. ‘That’s not a word I like to use.’
‘Molest? Why? That’s what you are, a child molester. I am married to a child molester.’
‘And you have known this for years, so don’t try and convince me this is news.’
Sofia bit her lip and looked away. ‘Please, Patrick. We can’t carry on like this. Your behaviour is killing me. I have to tell someone.’
A rush of tears fell from her eyes leaving dark streaks of eyeliner. Patrick placed his newspaper on the cushions and rose to his feet. Gently, he placed both hands on her shoulders like he was giving her a pep talk. ‘I’m sorry, Sofia, I really am, but carrying on like thisisthe onlyway. If it comes out publicly that you knew about me but we stayed together, or that it wasourmoney I used in return for parental silence, then your life as you know it will be over just as quickly as mine. And I swear to you, I will not go down for this alone. Even though it would pain me to do it, I’ll tell anyone who’ll listen about the role you played.’
Sofia saw red, drew her arm back and slapped him hard across the face. With one hard shove, Patrick pushed her backwards and into the wall, where she lost her footing and crumpled to a heap on the floor. Patrick rubbed his smarting cheek before calmly pouring himself a brandy from a decanter.
