For the challenge, Christopher thought to himself.For the fun of it. For the history books. For having the balls and ambition to decide to be a serial killer rather than fall into it or be compelled to do it. To actively choose this life and then to actively stop it. Because nobody has ever done it like this before. And because there’s no other feeling quite like being in control of someone else’s life.
‘I don’t know,’ he instead replied, and thought it best to comfort her again. He stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, bringing her towards him. ‘Maybe it’s because he simplycan,’ he added, kissing the top of her head. ‘So he does.’
Amy clung to the security of her boyfriend’s strong, warm arms for a moment as he remained behind her, wishing he could have seen the expression on her face when she first saw a photo of what he was capable of. Even he might have identified what revulsion looked like.
Chapter 38
JADE
Jade was awake for much of her first night in Australia and not just because of the jetlag.
Coming to terms with the news of Kevin’s terminal illness and the realisation that she didn’t love him had left her bewildered; angry at him and even more angry at herself.
In the quietness of the farm’s guest house, she turned on the bedside lamp and logged on to the Wi-Fi to research whether this was normal – not feeling anything for her Match. She knew there was a love between them but she hadn’t experienced the deafening, booming, colourful fireworks or rainbows that the films and TV programmes she’d watched depicted. Fictional couples with a DNA Match always fell hook, line and sinker for one another the instant they came into contact. Why wasn’t it happening to her?
She checked the official Match Your DNA website: ‘The emotions felt between two Matches can vary from couple to couple,’ it read. ‘For some, it happens in an instant; for others, it can take several meetings or several days before the connection is made. This can sometimes be due to the mental capacity of a couple or an individual, or an illness, which can affect the production of pheromones andreceptors. A change in a Match’s body clock can also affect the way they process their emotions.’
Jade began to feel a little better about herself knowing her predicament wasn’t uncommon. She’d begun to worry it was Kevin’s condition and how little he resembled the photos that were delaying her feelings, and the fact that she was a shallow, superficial cow. Now armed with new knowledge, she felt much more relieved. It would happen, she just had to wait for it. Although in the long run, she acknowledged that it would be hard being head over heels in love with a man who wouldn’t see out the summer.
Suddenly there came a gentle knocking on her door. ‘Come in,’ she replied and propped herself up on her elbows. The door slowly opened and Kevin’s smiling face appeared.
‘Hey,’ he said. ‘I saw your light was still on. Do you want to come and see something?’
‘Sure,’ she said. The clock on the wall read 3.56am.
‘I’ll meet you by your car in fifteen minutes. Bring a jumper. Early mornings are cold as ice out here. Oh, and your keys, of course.’
Kevin was already standing by the car and leaning against his walking frame when Jade appeared. ‘Let’s go,’ he said chirpily.
He directed them as she drove along the dirt track driveway and back onto the highway. They travelled for around ten minutes until they reached a flat region by the side of the road.
‘You can’t come to Australia without seeing the sun rise,’ Kevin said. ‘It’s like nothing on earth.’
They sat together, listening to a playlist of soul classics as the darkness gradually lifted and was replaced by a purple and orange hew.
‘How often do you come out here?’ she asked.
‘Quite a lot when I was first diagnosed,’ he said. ‘Then I went into a dark place for a while. I was angry ateverything, especially thinking that everyone else would have a lifetime of sunrises and sunsets, while mine were limited. Then I began to understand that being here to see any sunrise was a major accomplishment. It means I’ve lived for one more day.’
Jade instinctively placed her head on Kevin’s shoulder, where it remained until the sun rose and he’d long drifted off to sleep. His hand was cold, his skin parchment-like and she wondered how he might have felt to the touch before cancer started eating away at him.
While the intense Match Your DNA love was still undoubtedly missing, there was no doubt that she felt relaxed around him. They’d shared so many intense conversations by phone that she’d come to see him as a best friend as well as her Match. Maybe that was more important than anything else, she thought. Maybe when you took it back to basics, that’s what love really was: just being there for someone when the sun rises and sets.
Jade arrived back at the farm with her sleeping partner and was greeted by his brother who opened the passenger door and unclipped Kevin’s seatbelt. He scooped him into his arms and carried him back into the house as Jade looked on, suddenly feeling the first pangs of something that she couldn’t identify.
Chapter 39
NICK
Nick nursed the steaming polystyrene cup of hot chocolate he’d bought from the kiosk a safe distance away from the grass pitches. He’d contemplated buying himself a burger too until he spotted the filthy fingernails of the man serving behind the counter.
It was the first rugby game he’d ever attended – his school had been keener to teach hockey than rugby – and it was as cold as hell outside. He pulled the grey cashmere scarf Sally had bought for his birthday tightly around his neck and his hoodie up over his head to keep his ears warm.
What am I doing here?he wondered, having no clue what the game’s rules were or what the state of play was on the pitch. All he knew was that he could barely keep his eyes off the one player in front of him.
Nick’s eyes moved from Alex’s calves to his thick, tree trunk thighs and then his solid torso. He almost willed himself to be turned on by Alex’s physical appearance so their Match might start making sense. If they had been pre-determined to be together, surely he’d feel at least a mild sexual arousal? But there was nothing.
On a whim, Nick had decided to spend his morning watching the game. He’d recalled the framed photo ofthe team on the wall of Alex’s office and had searched online for their fixtures list to see when they were playing next. The location was a community rugby pitch in Birmingham’s suburbs but, aware of how creepy it might appear if he suddenly turned up unannounced, Nick stood a distance away from the other supporters to watch Alex from afar.
