‘I’m not! Believe me, if I were one or the other, you and I would not be living together and about to get married. It’d open up a new world of opportunities for me and I’d be out there trying to stick my dick in a whole load of new places.’
‘You’re taking this very seriously.’
‘I just don’t want you thinking that I’m a secret closet case, because that’d mean our whole relationship was a lie. And this is the most honest relationship I’ve ever been in.’
‘Oh honey, come here, I’m only teasing,’ Sally said. ‘I don’t think you’re gay, but you must admit, it’s kind of amusing. You’re like that old R. Kelly song … “your mind’s telling you no, but your body—”’
‘You are not funny.’ Nick topped up Sally’s glass with wine and took a large gulp himself.
‘Well, I don’t know how else to react other than to joke about it, because apparently we are not destined to be together. And while the man of my dreams has yet to make himself known, the man of your dreams could be living in the next street to us. He lives in Birmingham too. What kind of strange coincidence is that? We may even already know him …’
‘Don’t be silly. And there is no “man of my dreams” …’
‘Not according to the email …’
Nick rolled his eyes.
‘Shall we see if we can find him on Facebook?’ Sally continued.
‘What?’
‘Come on, let’s see if I can find my competition.’
‘No, I don’t want to.’
‘Are you scared you might develop a little bit of a crush on your future husband?’
Nick shook his head. ‘Look, we don’t even know his surname.’
Sally took the phone from his hand and within three swipes of the keypad, paid the £9.99 required for more details. ‘Name: Alexander Landers Carmichael,’ she read out loud. ‘Age: thirty-two. Occupation: physiotherapist. Eyes: grey – like mine. Hair: dark – like mine.’ She smiled. ‘Height, five foot eight – again, like me. Babe, you do have a type, don’t you? He sounds like my double.’
‘With three exceptions – two breasts and a vagina.’
‘That should be enough information to find him on Facebook.’
‘I don’t really think I want to—’
‘Oh, come on, it’ll be fun.’
Sally typed in Alexander’s name and scrolled down through the list of postage-stamp-sized pictures that appeared. ‘What are the chances of there being fourAlexander Carmichaels in the Birmingham area? I’ll use his middle name as well – there can’t be that many Landers.’
‘Just the one it seems,’ Nick replied, pointing at the screen.
They simultaneously squinted at the thumbnail photograph and Sally tried to click on to his profile. However, Alexander Carmichael’s privacy settings wouldn’t enable anyone who wasn’t his friend to look any further. But even from the small picture, both recognised he was a handsome man. His lantern jaw sported dark stubble, his hair had a slight curl and touched his collar, his lips were full and his eyes were wide and warm.
‘I’ve got to hand it to you, babe,’ Sally said. ‘Your DNA has really good taste in men.’
Chapter 20
ELLIE
Andrei opened the car door for Ellie and she followed him along the canal towpath and into the building ahead.
‘You don’t have to come inside, I’m sure it’ll be OK,’ she told him, fairly sure there was little danger lying in wait for her in the provincial pub.
‘This is what you pay me for,’ Andrei replied in his husky Eastern European accent, and went inside to scout the room regardless. Throughout his three years in her employment, he had proven he was worth his weight in gold, having taken punches and even a broken bottle thrust into his chest for her. Ellie turned her head to see the other two members of her security detail in a car parked behind the one she’d arrived in.
‘OK,’ she conceded, ‘but don’t let him see you. Be subtle, I don’t want you scaring him off.’
