CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Knees trembling, I jolted away from Ezra. “I didn’t do anything,” I began absurdly, before Julian cut me off.
“I warned you from the start that your behavior is a reflection of the House.” Despite the anger that darkened his eyes, Julian’s voice was even and cold. “And now I find you sullying yourself with some common boy right here in our Mission?”
“Senior,” I said hoarsely, gripping the loose fabric of my trousers. I needed something to hold on to as the room tilted.
“Julian,” Ezra said, starting toward him with a growl. “That’s too far.” My ears were ringing. I grabbed Ezra by the sleeve, terrified for him. Julian was no Transistor, but for all I knew, he’d attack Ezra for his inappropriate advances anyway. “Let it be,” I said shakily. “Get out of here.” To Julian, I pleaded, “I invited him in. It’s my fault. Leave him alone.”
“Leave him alone?” Julian echoed, disbelieving. He laughed bitterly and looked at Ezra. “What a tremendous hold you have on her.”
“I’m not a child!” I snapped. As soon as I spoke, I knew how immature that sounded. “Don’t talk about me like I’m not here.”
“Return to your room,” Julian told me. “Now. We’ll discuss this shortly.”
Unbearably gentle, Ezra pried my hand away from his sleeve. “Go on, Jo. I’ll make my escape so your Senior can shame you.”
For the first time, Julian sounded as if his composure had slipped. “Oh, this ismyfault?”
Ezra lifted his hands in mock surrender. “I’m not the one enforcing ridiculous rules.”
I gave Ezra a desperate push. “Leave. We’re dangerous. You shouldn’t be arguing with him.”
“Is that so?” Ezra asked, taking a lunging step toward Julian. I felt invisible. Neither one of them was acknowledging me. For the first time since I’d met him, Ezra looked dangerous. He sneered at Julian. “Do you really think Julian Gray is going to hurt me?”
Before I could shout a warning, Julian hit Ezra in the stomach so hard, he sagged to the floor, only held upright by Julian grabbing his shirt at the shoulder. “Do you require any further proof?” Julian asked, panting.
“Stop it!” I screamed, unleashing a bolt of radiance that struck the floor at their feet and left a spidery, smoking scorch mark. “Both of you stop it!”
They were no longer ignoring me.
Moving only his fingers, Julian released Ezra and let him scramble up and away. “Control yourself, Apprentice Haven,” he said carefully, straightening slowly.
Ezra made a show of casually brushing the wrinkles out of his shirt, but I could see the way he glanced at the burn mark. I could see the way his hands trembled. I’d frightened him. I’d frightened him far more than Julian had.
I hated them both.
I stomped between them to escape to my room, barely able to feel my own footsteps. It was like my mind had detached from my body. Iwas no longer worried for either of them. Somehow, I knew Ezra would walk away from here, and Julian would let him go unscathed.
And me? I’d lose everything.
In my room, I stared at my hands. Radiance shimmered along the lines on my palms. For a while, I didn’t try to stop it. I wasn’t even sure I could. I certainly couldn’t calm the raging cadence of my heartbeat.
Then I thought about Ezra’s fear. It had been different from the times I’d accidentally hurt him. I’d wanted to scare him. Both of them. And it had worked.
With a shuddering sigh, I closed my hands into fists and willed the radiance back into the core of me where it could simmer alongside my misery.
Julian knocked on my door a few minutes later and pushed it open when I ignored him. We regarded each other silently. I was vaguely relieved to see him in one piece despite the fact that I’d been far more worried about Ezra.
His throat bobbed with a swallow before he finally announced, without emotion, “Due to your wanton and reckless behavior, I have no choice but to send you back to Sterling City.”
I’d known in my bones that he’d send me away, but it still felt as if he’d thrown me into a deep, dark well.
I’d failed.
I was a failure.
The mule brayed outside, and my ears rang with a sound like the skitter of radiance through thin wire.
