“That’s no matter, is it?”
“Stop making no sense. You told me I don’t listen, but you don’t say anything that’s not some game.”
“Maybe I’m not sure I can trust you anymore, Natey.” Alden pulled his sleeve out of Nate’s grip restlessly. He sat cross-legged on the floor beside Nate’s bedding and pressed his fingers against his forehead.
“I’m not in a position to sell you out,” Nate said.
“But you might say too much, confide in the wrong person. I’ve told you time and again that I don’t come by Remedy cheaply. I’m told they were looking for you, for the Tinkerer.” He exhaled noisily. “If you get caught, guess who they’ll be looking for next?”
Nate frowned. Alden never let anyone push him around. He fed A-Vols credits and chem and sent them on their way. Something—someone—else worried him.
“Exactly,” Alden said, studying Nate’s face. “It will be my lovely neck on the line.”
“So you’re only looking out for yourself.”
Alden stared a moment and then laughed once, sharply. “You’re starting to learn, sweetness. That’s good.”
“You can trust me,” Nate said. “Tell me what’s going on.”
“Other than my dearest friend feeding his very life to a street thief?”
Nate checked a flinch and waited, refusing to respond to the bait. They’d never called each other friends. They’d never called each other anything.
Alden, for once, turned away. “There’s a problem with Remedy,” he said.
Everything went gray. “What?”
“My supplier hasn’t shown up, and I can’t track her down. The last batch I’ve got. . .I don’t know.” Alden never sounded this unsure—scattered. “I’m trying to stretch it, but it’s not lasting long.”
“You weren’t worried few days ago.”
“You weren’tdyinga few days ago. I thought we had more time. I didn’t think you’d be at the shop this much. I didn’t know you’d throw your life away for your gang—despite being clearly warned not to feed for too long. “
“I’m not dying,” Nate said, hollowed out by Alden’s words.
“How would you know one way or another?” Alden asked, clipped and too loud. “You’ve been sleeping the days away. And Itold youyou can’t be here so often.”
Alden had told him all along, from the very first time Nate had shown back up at the shop, that he needed to be careful. That Alden wasn’t made of Remedy. It had always seemed like Alden’s way of making him suffer for leaving. For the past year, every one of their interactions had been too thick with shame and anger and fear to untangle the real meaning of a threat.
“I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I couldn’t watch Reed die when there was a way to help him.”
Alden’s black eyes pierced him. “Do you love him?”
“Reed?” Nate blinked, thrown off. “I told you, we’re not—”
“Fucking. Yes, you did mention that. Call me a romantic, but I didn’t know that was a prerequisite for loving somebody.”
“What do you know about love, Alden?”
A huff of breath shook Alden’s narrow shoulders. He shot Nate a rueful, ugly smile. “It’s a simple question.”
The room had darkened as the candles began to sputter and die out around them. “Why do you care?”
“I told you, Natey. I’m a romantic.”
Nate rolled onto his side with a groan, his body aching from being still too long. “You’re a lunatic, is what you are.”
“The little girl says you love him,” Alden said.
