Everyone I pass wears the same black uniform—tailored, pressed, pristine. They move in formation, like even their posture’s been regulated. I, on the other hand, look like I just crawled out of a smuggler’s hold. Which... isn’t inaccurate.
I need to keep my head down. Blend in. Just until I can figure out how this place works, and how to survive it. One month. That’s it. Then I can get the rest of Mum’s journals, get the fuck out of here, and get back to Bren—back home.
Butas we descend, heads turn, and the looks I get aren’t curious. They’re assessing, cold, like farmers checking livestock before a slaughter. Ezzy notices, too.
“Umm, maybe it’s best if we grab your uniformbeforethe Initiation Brief. Just a quick detour,” she says, eyeing me up and down. “I mean, I’ve got nothing against Outerlanders, but I can’t speak for everyone else... and right now, your outfit’s kind of screaming, stabme now.”
At the base of the staircase, instead of following the stream of cadets spilling into the courtyard, Ezzy tugs gently at my elbow and veers left.
“We’ll be quick,” she whispers, leading me toward a small arched alcove cut into the stone wall where a narrow window sits behind an iron grate. On the other side, a plain-faced woman with skin like wilted parchment and a mouth pinched into a thin line looks up from her desk.
“Good morning!” Ezzy chirps, undeterred. “We’re here to collect two standard winter uniforms, patrol and training, second-year. Oh, and if we could also get a Citadel Codex of Order, that would be amazing.”
The woman blinks once, exhaling hard, it sounds like pure annoyance. Then without a word, she disappears through a curtain behind her.
“The Codex has all the rules,” Ezzy says, fingers twitching at her sides like she’s resisting the urge to fidget. “You’ll want toread it. Cover to cover. Some of the infractions sound completely made up, but they’ll still nail you for them.”
I raise an eyebrow. “Like?”
“Well, there’s one about duelling in the library. And another, something about no Thread manipulation within fifteen feet of cattle… which, okay, I guess is valid. But then there’s also a section on seditious posture. Whatever that means.” She gives an easy shrug.
“You ever question the rules in that Codex, or just follow them blind?” I ask, casual as anything, but still watching her reaction.
“I mean… Some of them are weird. But they’re there for a reason, right? Keep the peace, keep us safe...”
Before I can push, the woman returns with two neatly folded bundles and a thick leather-bound book. She clears her throat, and shoves the items through the slot without so much as eye contact.
“Thank you so much,” Ezzy gleams like she’s just been gifted gold instead of uniforms and passive aggression.“Changing rooms are just through there.” She turns, handing me the set and points down a side corridor. “I’ll wait out here so we’re not late to the Initiation Brief.”
I look down at the clothes in my hands. Fuck, if Bren could see me now. A familiar pressure pulses behind my ribs, small, subtle, but I swallow hard and head down the corridor.
A few minutes later, I step back out, tucking the edge of the black pullover into a pair of training pants. The fit’s snug, too snug. Like it was made for me. The thought alone sends a jolt of wrongness through my chest. The fabric’s thick but breathable, built for movement and violence. A wide leather belt sits high on my waist, twin sheaths stitched into either side.
It’s strange. I’ve never worn anything new before—no rips, no frayed seams, no blood soaked so deep it’s part of the pattern.I look down and barely recognise the girl staring back. For once, I look put together.
And that’s the problem.
Because this uniform doesn’t just fit. It claims me. Makes me look like one of them, part of the same system that left my people to starve. The pulsing pressure builds behind my chest. My skin itches, feels traitorous, like it’s adjusting when it should be rejecting every thread.
Rememberwhyyou’re here Lyra.
One month, one fucking month. Then I'm out, free. And if I get those journals, maybe I will get the truth, answer to questions I’ve always wanted to know.The fire...Plus I’m in no mood to visit dragons anytime soon.
“Oh my stars, you look amazing! See?” Ezzy does a little spin in place, delighted as I step in front of her. “Now you look like one ofus! You don’t look so… poor.” She smiles like she’s just handed me the greatest compliment in the world.
My mouth twitches as she hands me the Codex. You can tell, she’s not trying to be cruel. That’s the worst part. Sheactuallymeans it. No malice, just pure, unfiltered naivety. Back home, a comment like that might’ve earned someone a split lip. Here? There’s no point correcting her, not with wordsorfists, not with someone this sheltered. She hasn’t seen the real world, has no idea how hard it gets.
So I just shove the Codex into my pack on top of my old clothes, slide it on to my shoulder and nod toward the courtyard.
“Let’s go,” I mutter through clenched teeth, about to turn when Ezzy frowns.
“Wait.” Her eyes narrow at my waist. “It’s not complete.”
Before I can ask, she reaches to her side, pulls one of the two daggers from her belt, and holds it out to me hilt-first.
“Here. Everyone gets two. You’re missing both.”
I blink. Stare. I don’t take handouts, don’t take charity, don’t like owing anyone. But it’s a weapon and I never turn down a weapon. I reach out, not fast, not grateful.
