I shake my head. “It’s the same as the last five. Scrubbed clean.”
He exhales hard and keeps reading.
I was surprised when he said he wanted to help. Ezzy and Finn don’t believe him, but he swears the people he saw in Ashvale eyes were all black—no whites, no pupils, just endless dark, just like that dragon I saw in the square. And you can tell he also doesn’t buy the story about them veering off migration paths either. There’s no explaining away what they did to Ashvale. Not when he saw it first-hand.
And honestly, I’m grateful he’s here because if anyone around here would know something about dragons, it’d be Rowan. The books he’s always buried in? All dragon-related. And those little model displays Finn keeps breaking? Also dragons, and he’s never heard of one with black eyes.
Rowan shifts, about to say something, when the door behind us groans open. Heavy boots follow as Professor Strannt, Weasel Senior, sweeps into the room in deep-blue robes, cane tapping in a slow, deliberate rhythm against the stone. Moving to the second row, he pulls a book from the shelf—the same one I just put back. For a heartbeat, I swear he studies the ragged edge where someone, maybe me, has been prying pages free.
“Hmm. Seems this one’s in need of a little repair,” he notes, as he drags his thumb along the torn edge.Then his weaselly eyes flick to us, and I straighten without meaning to. He holds my gaze a second too long. Then, finally: “You’ll both be late for the afternoon briefing,” he adds, eyes narrowing. “Might be wise to conclude your studies and head down to the courtyard.”
Not unkind, just firm, but definitely not a suggestion.
We’re not doing anything wrong, other than the odd page I borrow, but technically, cadets are allowed in here; there’s nothing classified on these shelves—nothing the Citadel hasn’t already scrubbed clean. They only keep what they want us to read. Everything else has been redacted, removed, or buried deep enough we’ll never find it. But still, we’ve been in here most days over the break, combing through whatever we can find, hopeful, but every trail ends the same. No reports of dragons or people with black eyes. No records of veil breaches. Nothing useful. Although dragons have been seen migrating between the Southern and Northern Peaks, no one’s bonded with a dragon since the Treaty—and apparently, once they were exiled, any interest in tracking their behaviour stopped.
I’d hoped to stay longer, see what else we could find, but Rowan is already packing up before I can say anything. I’d like to say it’s just about the information that I want to stay for. But not just that. The truth is, I don’t want to leave, not yet. Because once I step out of this library, it’s not just Ezzy and Finn who will be back today, it’s Talen too.
Ahead of me, Rowan pauses at the last shelf, sliding a book into place with that same quiet precision he always moves in. I wait a second longer than I need to, then fall into step beside him as we head out, and the library door clicks shut behind us.
The hallway’s cold, air sharp in my throat—but my palms are sweating anyway, nerves don’t seem to care it’s winter. Fuck. I’ve managed to avoid thinking about Talen for the past two weeks. Rowan hasn't asked anything either, which suits me fine; not talking about it just makes it way easier to pretend it didn’t mean anything.
Yeah, I kissed him. But it was only a kiss.
And I wasn't even kissing a Citadel Officer that night, not really. That night, he was just a guy, a stupidly good-looking guy who’s repeatedly saved my life. The same guy that could’veReassigned that merchant in the square, but didn’t. Just handed him a strange envelope and let him walk. Plus, I know it must have been him who was dropping the Spice to Rhiann when I couldn't.
I’ve heard people talk about the things he’s done, dark things, things that should scare me. But that’s all it’s ever been. Talk. I’ve never seen it with my own eyes.
The only time I saw anything was when he killed that Cadet in Demonstrations, but Beth said he was too far gone, that he was in pain and wasn’t coming back. And after sitting through more of those sessions, I get it. No one steps in; they just let them scream until someone drags them off. But Talen didn’t. He ended it. Fast.
I’m not saying he’s good. I’m not even saying I trust him. But maybe he’s not the villain I thought he was? And anyway, it’s not like one kiss makes me a traitor. Right?
At least that’s what I’ve been trying to tell myself for the past two weeks.
The library’s tucked upstairs in one of the northern wings, quiet enough that even our footsteps echo, but as we head back toward the main stairwell, the noise hits—voices rising, boots clattering, the courtyard below already buzzing with returning cadets and the louder it gets, the tighter my chest pulls, because the truth is,he isa Citadel officer. Part of this system, and it was stupid, a reckless mistake. Just because I want something doesn’t mean I should have it. Especially after I found the Snare Urchin in his pocket, everything in me wants to believe it wasn't him; logically, it doesn't make sense, but still, how did he get it?
God, I want answers. Desperately. The tailor shop, the sign on the door, the envelopes, the black eyes that keep turning up in places they shouldn’t.
It’s not a coincidence, not after what happened in Ashvale. Every instinct I have says it’s connected, and that Talen knows what's going on.
I need to get my shit together. Bite down the want. Pretend the kiss never happened. Play the part and lean into this fake relationship—because if I let myself want him, really want him, I’ll lose focus. And I can’t afford that. Not when he’s the only lead I’ve got.
As we step into the courtyard, Ezzy’s easy to spot, her blonde hair catching the afternoon sun like a flare. She’s already found Finn. And, for once, they’re not bickering. I guess the time apart was good for them, too.
We cross through the crowd, breath misting in the winter cold, tension still low and sharp in my gut.They turn as we approach, Finn gives me an elbow bump and that cheeky grin he always wears like armour, but I don’t get a chance to fire back because Ezzy’s already crashing into me, arms thrown around my shoulders before I can react.
Guilt flares, tight in my throat and for a second, I think about pulling away. The last and final lie I told her was on the way back to the Citadel, right before she left for break. I told her Bren thought the thing with Talen was fake, that I’d said as much, because I had been hooking up with Bren previously, and it made things complicated.
She didn’t push, just nodded, quiet. But there was something in the way she looked that made me wonder if she really bought it.
Her grip tightens around me, all limbs and warmth, but I don’t pull away. Because it’s nice, because I missed her and because I’m done lying.
When she finally lets go, it’s like blood can reach my head again, and my vision sharpens as the courtyard comes back into focus. Beth’s by the eastern archway, still just as beautiful, justas perfect, she’s talking with a few cadets I vaguely recognise—ones I’ve sat near in lectures. A few paces back, I unfortunately spot Ryven, he’s twisting a toothpick between his teeth, half-smirking as he throws his weight into Elijah, who laughs and shoves him back. Professor Strannt is here too, but there’s no sign of his weaselly son. Maybe I would’ve thought twice about knocking him out if I’d known I’d be coming back to this shit-hole. Not looking forward to that reunion.
Finn shifts beside me, like he’s about to say something—one of those dumb grins curling at the edge of his mouth—but whatever it is gets caught behind his teeth as the air shifts and suddenly the room goes silent—no warning, no signal. My throat feels tight like something's pressing down on it, and I realise it’s not just me. No one's talking. Hell, I can't even hear anyone breathing.
Then a flash of red catches my eye as Merrin steps on to the centre platform, robes catching the light like fire, his gaze sweeping over us like he’s counting bodies, not people.
A few of the other professors in blue gather off to the side. My chest lifts too quick to hide. But it’s not because of them, it’s him. Talen.
